Miscellaneous: Today, a friend and I were walking around a festival when out...

Anonymous 2 May 2013, 06:29 United States

Today, a friend and I were walking around a festival when out of nowhere a giant bug hit me in the face. I went into instant ninja mode, screaming and flailing. When I stopped, I realized it was just a leaf and everyone was staring at me. FML

87 comments

Collection

Halloween

A failed costume, stolen candy and a very real scare: Halloween, the one night when fear is allowed.

Same thing different taste

Kat 12 February 2022, 00:01 Gisborne, New Zealand

Free glasses for all

Today, as I was hanging washing out in the sun, a huge cicada flew into my face and somehow got behind my glasses. I screamed and ripped them off and ran away. I came back to a broken pair of VERY expensive glasses. FML

2 comments

hulagirl1217 29 May 2010, 12:11 United States

Today, a bee landed on my leg. I didn't realize it was there until my friend yelled out, "Bee!" kicked me in the leg, and ran off. I fell to the ground screaming and clutching my leg. She missed the bee and it still stung me. FML

123 comments

buttercup92 31 May 2016, 03:45 San Antonio, United States

Today, while hiking, I walked face first into a spider web. Freaking out, I shook my hair out in case there was a spider. Later on in the day the spider fell from my hair into my food. FML

41 comments

life_sucks 16 January 2010, 18:46 New Zealand

Today, this huge wasp started flying around me. I freaked out and started running from it. Then I slipped, landed face-first in some dog poo, and got stung by the wasp on my leg. FML

56 comments

funnnyyyyy -_- This FML is from back in 2015 but it's good stuff Kathmandu, Nepal

RIP

Today, I was singing along to my favorite song when a giant bug flew into my mouth. I was so shocked, I almost swallowed it. After I was done freaking out, my sister wanted to throw the bug a big funeral for its "heroic sacrifice" in shutting me up. FML

42 comments

Robbo 26 October 2024, 22:00 New York, United States

Autumn vibes

Today, I went for a jog to enjoy the fall weather. I tripped over a tree root and fell face-first into a pile of leaves. As I tried to get up, a bunch of kids had gathered to laugh, and one even shouted something about, “A grown-ass man playing in the leaves!” FML

0 comment

CantPublish 4 September 2012, 22:02 United States

Today, I saw a bug on a stranger's arm and as a knee-jerk reaction smacked it. It took me a second before I realized it was actually a loose scab. FML

49 comments

benz1369 This FML is from back in 2016 but it's good stuff Toronto, Canada

Freakout

Today, while stocking the green beans at work, I picked up a "leaf" which turned out to be a grasshopper. I screamed so loud, my coworkers now think I'm crazy. This is only my second week here. FML

15 comments

Anon 19 December 2009, 16:07 United States

Today, I was standing in line at a coffee shop and I noticed that there was a bug on the guys face in front of me. Trying to be nice I lightly smacked it off. His reaction was to punch me in the face. Repeatedly. FML

149 comments

iAMloud 19 March 2011, 02:29 United States

Today, I was riding to a prom with my friends in the middle of a swamp-covered area. I stuck my head out the top and screamed like they do in the movies. My hair, makeup, and mouth were quickly filled with bugs. FML

165 comments

dontpanic_fml 32

2 May 2013, 13:00

Quick tutorial. Ninjas do: Swiftly chop bugs before they can hit face Ninjas don't: Scream and flail

Ambient25 25

2 May 2013, 12:19

Just tell them you were practicing your mosh

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Comments (87)

Ambient25 25

2 May 2013, 12:19

Just tell them you were practicing your mosh

sux4u121 10

2 May 2013, 15:53

I just imagined, what if it wasn't a music festival? "Just practicing my mosh guys" "...at an art festival?". I realize gow ******* stupid this is, just made me chuckle.