Today, I finally got my 14-year-old son to aim while using the bathroom. If only I could get my husband to do the same. FML
Collection
Halloween
A failed costume, stolen candy and a very real scare: Halloween, the one night when fear is allowed.
Same thing different taste
Today, my husband taught our son how to pee while standing. His aim is as poor as my husband's, but I guess now they can blame their mess on each other. FML
Firehose
Today, my is still peeing on the toilet seat and floor. When will it get better? My son is 18 years-old and apparently can’t aim in the toilet. I had to sit on the pee he left on the toilet seat the other day. FML
Today, I found out the guys I live with have an ongoing contest to see if they can hit targets on the inside of the toilet lid with urine when they pee. I could forgive this in my seven-year-old son, but not my forty-year-old husband. FML
I just can't hide it
Today, my son learned how to use the toilet for the first time. He was so excited he started peeing on the floor. FML
Today, I caught my 4 year old son yet again trying to drink out of the toilet. FML
Boys will be annoying boys
Today, I was under the impression that my kids would eventually grow out of wanting to watch me use the bathroom. Instead, my 7 year-old son attempted to pick the lock so he could watch me take a shit and make fun of me for it. FML
Today, I finally convinced my son to use the potty. Later, he saw a show on TV about a toilet monster. Now he's too scared to even step foot into the bathroom. Here's to another few months of diaper changes. FML
Dude, gross!
Today, my 16-year-old brother once again scored well at a local archery competition. He got home and, once again, unleashed his "spectacular aim" at the toilet - or rather the toilet seat and surrounding floor. He refuses to clean the bathroom we share every single time he does this. FML
New urinal
Today, my wife caught our six-year-old son peeing in the bathroom sink. He pulled his little stool up in front, that he uses to brush his teeth, and was peeing in the sink. When we asked why, he said that he wanted to pee like a man, "like we do at football games." My son is using our bathroom sink as an urinal. FML
Check where you sit
Today, I went to the bathroom after my 9 year-old nephew. Apparently nobody taught him to lift the seat when he pees, or how to aim properly, because when I sat down, I sat in his pee. FML
Top comments
majesticprincess 19
Psh that's an easy fix. Start making them clean it and after a few times they'll be able to aim through a cheereo
sdroze1389 31
throw a cherrio in the toilet and impulse will make him want to hit it. it's how I got my little cousin to aim.
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Comments (74)
Rkikkas9713 25
As a guy, it's not that we miss the center of the toilet, it is that it's coming out with such force that the water from the toilet splashes back up onto the seat.
rydin10 18
Sometimes it gets out of control and it just gets everywhere. It sucks but sometimes the guy just can't make it better. Although it is common courtesy to at least wipe it up
RadikulRam 16
Sometimes urine doesn't come out in a straight line. Around the bottom it sprays. It could be that which is happening, and I'm not sure if this happens to other guys, but after ejaculation mine sprays all around. Too much information? I'll crawl back into my cave.
Frungy 9
Ask your husband if perhaps his urine stream is splitting. This means that instead of the urine coming out in one stream it splits into two or three streams. When this happens you can't aim all three at once and the result is a mess (that good manners dictates you should at least try to clean up). There could be many causes for this, such as trauma to the lower part of the urethra, a urinary tract infection, small kidney stones, small obstructions near the end of the urethra, etc. None of these conditions are life-threatening, although some can be extremely painful (think child-birth painful) but most of them can be solved pretty easily by a visit to a urologist. It is at least worth asking the question rather than insulting assuming that your husband is a child.
Pycnogonida 16
Regardless of why it's happening, the fact is - he's not cleaning his pee up and is repeatedly leaving it for someone else to deal with, which puts him pretty firmly in the "immature and selfish" category in regard to his bathroom behavior.
coffeelicious 11
"Aim while you pee, it turns me on."
ChibiChick25 8
If you are a guy and you still haven't figured out how to pee in a toilet after 10+ years, then its time to accept the truth. Just sit on the toilet.
Migole 36
Basically every man I know pees sitting down and has been taught so since they were boys. Is this some kind of cultural thing that the men in the US need to feel masculine by making a mess?
ImTheAlpha 30
Yeah, in the US men generally pee standing up. I know some countries don't though. The making a mess part is not necessary, though some can't get that through their heads.
samlovesham1234 9
Are most of the men you know Muslim? Apparently its common for Muslim men to go to the bathroom sitting down.
chosha_fml 27
How can any man not get how gross and inconsiderate it is to pee on the seat and worse still just leave it there?
MoistWhale 2
Don't be so quick to judge the proud men who shoot from the hip! Pee on the seat can be caused by one of three things: 1: A guy peed while standing without raising the seat, but that's unlikely because the seat makes the toilet hole narrower, so guys usually raise it. And sometimes lower it afterwards... 2: A guy peed while sitting down and dripped on the seat when standing up. Quite easy to miss unless you actively check for this. 3: A woman did it, same as 2 The women from 3 are the same ones who leave the blood stains on the seat but hey, I don't judge...
limabeans101029 21
52- If someone, no matter what their gender, thinks it's okay to leave their pee or blood or other bodily fluids on a toilet seat, they deserve to be judged
MoistWhale 2
I'm just saying that if there's anything on the seat then the person who did it probably didn't even see it. And also that it's probably not because of aiming problems, because then the urine ends up on the ground.
pos20 26
Put a sticker there, gives them something to aim at
bonermonkey 31
lol if it was me I would intentionally make a mess when I peed and then ask him how he likes turning up to a bathroom covered in piss, cos that isn't any better than him sprinkling it everywhere