Today, I fell asleep in class. If that wasn't bad enough, I awoke gasping for air. I almost drowned in my arm fat. FML
Collection
Fall
Dead leaves, the first cold of the season and an umbrella flipped inside out: fall, the season of grace.
Today, I fell asleep in class. I'm the teacher. FML
Today, I was at work as a lifeguard. The temperature was absolutely stifling, but I tried to tough it out. A couple of hours into my shift, I passed out, fell off my stand, and crashed into the water. Or so the medics tell me. FML
Today, I was drinking a bottle of water. My friend came up from behind and scared me, causing me to inhale and choke on the water. Lacking air, I passed out. I awoke to him on the ground laughing his ass off. I almost drowned drinking a bottle of water. FML
Today, I woke up from another nightmare, this time drowning in a rogue wave. I could feel the water and rain. I could feel myself gasping for air as I don't know how to swim, and can barely float. I'm scared if I die in my sleep, I die for real. FML
Today, I was taking a lifeguard certification test. I nearly drowned halfway through. FML
Today, I fell asleep in class. As a joke, my professor used an airhorn to wake me up. I got so freaked out that I punched the girl next to me in the face. She got knocked out. FML
Today, I had to blow up an air mattress using only my lungs. After nearly passing out from lack of oxygen, I realized there was a hole in it. FML
Today, I choked on water so hard that I threw up and shat myself. FML
Today, like many other days, I fell asleep in math class. Unlike other days, however, I woke up with a start while ripping a really loud fart in my sleep. The whole class heard it because it was during a lecture. Even the teacher was laughing at me and I had to walk, no, run out of the room. FML
Today, I was in swimming practice at the pool. I suddenly got breathless, dizzy, and felt like I was drowning. I cried out to the instructor, telling him I had a weak heart. He shouted back, "I don't care about your love life! Swim, bitch!" FML
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Top comments
x805xUnknown 6
It's impossible too drown when no water is present, Dumbass.
nimasag1 0
I'm not fat, I'm fluffy
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Comments (136)
yung_dee 0
haha
metalmaiden 0
Are your arms like memory foam? :D
ihateme2 0
yup , i was right . all the people who complain about being fat and how they 'cant even more their own legs' or how, like this one, almost suffocated from their own fat, are from the States . yu people need to stop ******** on the world and get the **** up ad move .
cab227 2
like you don't have fat people where you live. it's not just the U.S.
ChrissyCaustic 0
Bahahahah. Suckzz
floodman360 0
1) get some shake weights 2) start giving out handjobs it's the same workout either way lol
spaceshan69 0
lose weight you fat nasty useless ****. suicide or a diet are your only options.
juicydez 0
this made me laugh, LOL jks that's gross-.- .... heehee
sicpupyz122 0
this really made me laugh fur like 13 1/2 minutes!
Andryah 0
Fat ass bitch!
SamIAm_4 0
Ahhaha thats kinda funny :D