Today, I fell asleep in class. If that wasn't bad enough, I awoke gasping for air. I almost drowned in my arm fat. FML
Collection
Fall
Dead leaves, the first cold of the season and an umbrella flipped inside out: fall, the season of grace.
Today, I fell asleep in class. I'm the teacher. FML
Today, I was at work as a lifeguard. The temperature was absolutely stifling, but I tried to tough it out. A couple of hours into my shift, I passed out, fell off my stand, and crashed into the water. Or so the medics tell me. FML
Today, I was drinking a bottle of water. My friend came up from behind and scared me, causing me to inhale and choke on the water. Lacking air, I passed out. I awoke to him on the ground laughing his ass off. I almost drowned drinking a bottle of water. FML
Today, I woke up from another nightmare, this time drowning in a rogue wave. I could feel the water and rain. I could feel myself gasping for air as I don't know how to swim, and can barely float. I'm scared if I die in my sleep, I die for real. FML
Today, I was taking a lifeguard certification test. I nearly drowned halfway through. FML
Today, I fell asleep in class. As a joke, my professor used an airhorn to wake me up. I got so freaked out that I punched the girl next to me in the face. She got knocked out. FML
Today, I had to blow up an air mattress using only my lungs. After nearly passing out from lack of oxygen, I realized there was a hole in it. FML
Today, I choked on water so hard that I threw up and shat myself. FML
Today, like many other days, I fell asleep in math class. Unlike other days, however, I woke up with a start while ripping a really loud fart in my sleep. The whole class heard it because it was during a lecture. Even the teacher was laughing at me and I had to walk, no, run out of the room. FML
Today, I was in swimming practice at the pool. I suddenly got breathless, dizzy, and felt like I was drowning. I cried out to the instructor, telling him I had a weak heart. He shouted back, "I don't care about your love life! Swim, bitch!" FML
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Top comments
x805xUnknown 6
It's impossible too drown when no water is present, Dumbass.
nimasag1 0
I'm not fat, I'm fluffy
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Comments (136)
simplyyamazingg 0
this made me lol . :)
surfnhottie7 0
looks like you need to hit the gym!
lindpickleee 0
hahaha, it's probably time to lose some weight ;)
lamargus 0
i don't get why you r complaining it's your fault!
kanbak 0
that might be a sign.
Sergio0514 0
hahahahahaha
Daederoth 10
Thank you for sharing this fml with everyone. I know it makes me feel better when I'm feeling blue, "hey, at least I didn't drowned in my own arm fat today, thank god for that!"
secretlyshy 0
Why would you post this? People are only going to berate you for it.
livelifetotheful_fml 0
effin funny
glitterbabe224 0
I don't like these 'hey I'm fat' fmls. seriously, get off your ******* ass.