Today, I discovered that when a cyclist tears down the street, slaps you across the face as he passes, looks back laughing and flips you off, then crashes into a lamppost, he'll still blame you and threaten to sue, even after you rush over to check his injuries. FML
Collection
Halloween
A failed costume, stolen candy and a very real scare: Halloween, the one night when fear is allowed.
Same thing different taste
Today, as I was walking to work, a cyclist shot out of nowhere and slammed into me. I hit the ground hard and lay there in agony. The guy quickly dusted himself off, said "Sorry man. It's a vicious cycle." then chuckled at his own stupid pun and cycled away. FML
Idiots on bikes
Today, as I pulled to a halt at a stop sign, a cyclist ripped through the air, slammed straight into my fender, and almost launched over my car. I ended up being cited for reckless driving. FML
Today, I accidentally hit a cyclist with my car. In panic, I jumped out of my car and ran up to him, who was lying on the floor, motionless. As I was about to check his pulse, he jumped up and shouted, "I bet you thought I was dead, asshole!" He then punched me in the face and cycled off. FML
BIKES
Today, I was riding my bike down a road I know is quite hazardous. Having almost been hit in the same spot the day before, I rode across the intersection very satisfied without having been injured. Until I crashed into the guy front of me and flipped over my handlebars. FML
Today, while walking to my car after work, I witnessed some moron who was texting while riding her bike running right into my parked car, resulting in a broken side mirror, a damaged windshield, two dents, and for her, a broken phone and nose. She's threatening to sue me for damages. FML
Fight! Fight!
Today, I stopped at a light when someone crashed into my motorcycle, making me fall. The guy claimed it was my fault because I'd stopped too fast. I got really mad, so I attempted to spit on his face and was ready to start a fight when I noticed that I'd forgotten to lift the helmet visor. FML
Today, some guy on a bike kept taunting me about my weight while I was out jogging. He ended up hitting a street lamp and fell off his bike. I had a real good laugh at him for all of 5 seconds before he got mad and really made me run. FML
Today, I was riding my bike home from the store. Wanting to impress some passers-by, I tried to do a trick on a sharp turn. I hit a pole with my balls. As I was lying on the ground in agony, a guy pulled over, took a picture, and took off laughing. FML
Rekt
Today, I rode my bike to work. While biking on the road, I gave a hand signal for turning left. A car passing the opposite way veered towards me and attempted to give me a high five. I now have cuts all over my body and my bike is in two pieces. FML
Lesson: Always have insurance and a dashcam!
Today, I got into an accident and my bike broke. My insurance expired 5 days ago and the accident wasn't even my fault. The lady was on the phone and on the wrong side of the road. She's threatening to sue me even though her car is in better condition. There are no witnesses and no cameras either. FML
Top comments
PrussiaisAwesome 15
I like to see him try to sue. That would be so funny.
mzrobinson 13
Sue back for assault and harassment! (;
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Comments (251)
PrussiaisAwesome 15
I like to see him try to sue. That would be so funny.
Futacy 30
Watch the cyclist try to post his own FML about this. "Today, while I was flipping a guy off..."
ahti546 11
This is why I hate the world.
Nbackus9 4
Is this FML real? He slapped you in the face but he didn't know you?
thisiscat 14
there's 3 sides to every story..
killdozer1 2
I don't know about australian court, but in america, you must have a court hearing to decide if there is a good enough case for it to go to trial. It probably would never make it past the lawyer that the cyclist probably can't afford.
PinkieKeen 20
He ain't got any proof
annie_nk 23
Wouldn't the lamp post be considered public property so trying to sue OP wouldn't do any good, right? Not that trying to sue the city would be any better...
36591951 9
I don't think the cyclist can sue any one. He seems to be at fault for what happened
BIGBOY4rmAHM 19
This is one of the most elaborate FMLs I've seen yet. Sue him back.
JocelynKaulitz 28
116 - I agree. Show them the bruise you will have on your face as proof.
metalwolf 17
I would like to believe that the court has common sense and will throw out junk lawsuits but the words "McDonalds" and "coffee" always come to mind.
jillybee101 7
If he can't afford a car, he can't afford a lawyer to take you to court with. Unless he's using the cycle to exercise and just decided to be a douchebag and bitch-slap you. Then Do the exact same to him; Run past him while he's on the ground, slap him, then run away while flipping him off. Do all o this with the most satanistic smile you can muster.
whoaaahorsie 7
137 - I dont think it was a junk lawsuit, actually. she had severe burns on her thighs, bottom and groin because the coffee was supposively 30 degrees hotter than normal.
Harpy20 24
I've never laughed so hard! Don't worry OP. considering the speed that Karma gets back to him, you won't have to worry about the lawsuit.
lexa1love 16
@144 However, I don't think most people would get a hot coffee and drive with it in between their legs. Maybe if you have a thermos but a flimsy McDs cup? Even 30 degrees cooler would still burn your sensitive parts.
kotabones 0
I love lamp
expertsmilee 26
I'd go check his injuries too. Gotta make sure they're severe enough for the dick level displayed...
TBelle4Ever 15
"Your Honor, I'm suing this man because after I rode by him on my bike, slapped him in the face, and flipped him off, I then ran into a streetlight. It is his fault that I crashed my bike into said pole!" is what his entire case would be.
nado13579 12
24- And would probably be voted YDI forty time more than FYL.
Haldami 2
The McDonald's lawsuit was about coffee that was too hot. It's not about some idiot who spilled coffee and sued because she didn't know it was supposed to be hot. Get your facts straight.
sniperkit 10
What 195 said. The coffee was way hotter than it should have been, and while only dumbasses put the McD's cups that close to their lady parts, she still suffered third degree burns all over her thighs and had to pay tons in hospital bills. She still would have gotten burned if it wasn't super hot anyways but maybe they wouldn't have been so bad. Regardless, it was way too hot and that's bad on McDonald's.
broseph_joseph 5
Ha. Serves him right. That's karma for ya.
Kamon97 23
Cyclists are some of the worst kinds of people >.
BlobfishUnite 14
It won't be funny at all. People like that will always win, because everyone else ARE ******* IDIOTS AND WILL BELIEVE EVERY SINGLE WORD OF HIS BULLSHIT. Not you guys. You are cool ?
tpuff 7
Comment moderated for rule-breaking.
What a dick you should have took his bike. :)
saintsrocksocks 10
No, that would give him something to sue for. Plus that's the bad thing and OP seems like a nice person. Only a dick would take his bike.
may651 14
Op is to nice. Beat that persons ass.
ebonyirony 29
Don't take a bike unless you're Ash. Only then are you qualified.
mhopper 13
*taken
Skyblu10 10
That sounds good, take the bike so then he WILL sue you.
sonicgreg 12
74 theres a reference in your statement and I can't place it.
hama806 19
Karma's a bitch for that dick, isn't it?
expertsmilee 26
I've often wondered, if when someone is a dick to you, and it's karma's way of getting you back, then is it ok to just go around being a dick to everyone as a conduit for karma?
LadySigyn 17
145- Its a Pokemon reference! and OP, I would have laughed my ass off at the cyclist; Karma is freaking amazing sometimes.
nado13579 12
145- It's from the first episode of Pokemon! :D Where Ash took Misty's bike and ran.
Link5794 18
And all the other episodes when he meets a new companion.
BlobfishUnite 14
OP will have to pay $999,999 or whatever
DawnShadow_fml 5
Comment moderated for rule-breaking.
Dafrick did I just post a terrible comment on
tpuff 7
An FML post.
domking1315 20
Why "dafrick" did you even comment?
fuzz97 23
Confirmed for 12-year-old, too immature to actually say "dafuq"
jillybee101 7
Yeah too bad FML stands for **** my life, not frick my life, dicktard.
Blackmail111 9
And that's when you take his wallet and run.
Death_Hoe_Inn 10
And kick the shit out of him
MelTheGreat 23
And date his sister.
zandalee 20
And throw your used tampon at him...
nevereyes 31
And dump a bucket of rotting animal parts on him.
CanWeMicrowaveIt 11
And after all that, ********** and finish while looking in his eyes like a boss.
Quinn32 16
Wow...now i know not to screw with FML commenters. You guys scare me.
klovemachine 24
This comment thread is awesome! XD
TzHaar_Joh_Zuhai 4
Is op a male? He wouldn't be able to use a tampon?
Death_Hoe_Inn 10
Throw the guy's mom's tampon at him
Death_Hoe_Inn 10
Throw the guy's mom's tampon at him
muis545 21
80 you're trying too hard
PeteyPablo12308 20
And 82, you didn't try hard enough.
PrussiaisAwesome 15
Why try when you can sit back and laugh?
BlobfishUnite 14
And throw into a volcano which erupts in midair and a giant robot appears out of nowhere and thakes his melting corpse into the center of the sun.
Hed_Hunter 2
I wouldnt like to be the cyclists lawyer...
onlychildFTW 34
Lawyer - "so you assaulted a guy, looked back, gave him the finger while laughing and then proceeded to crash into a lamp post" Biker - "that's right. And it's his fault." Lawyer - "I don't think I can represent an idiot like you." Biker - "why not?!?!" Lawyer - "I don't want to be laughed out of court!"
mzrobinson 13
Sue back for assault and harassment! (;
deBlobX 12
Harassment how?
MidnaLink 35
148 cause the idiot made a random point of randomly slapping OP. Any form of public violence, especially unprovoked, counts as harrassment.
itzia 7
Let him sue, you'll win for sure. You might end up getting compensated after ;P
iHeartRKO 5
Yup, there has to be a video camera near by that shows proof. Plus witnesses. Counter sue if he does sue
mhopper 13
All this suing going on sounds expensive!
kimg0885 23
Doesn't it make you wish he was hit by a bus?! Although his family would probably sue you on his behalf.
ebonyirony 29
Unless he's Regina George.
Rowdey 10
I don't think that quite deserves being hit by a bus.
ArielTheMermaid 17
If he got hit by a bus he'd have go to his Spring Fling with a spinal halo
guitarchic12 0
Damn..least you discovered something right? No? Okay
onlychildFTW 34
Uh this comment means what?
thacar 1
Just ignore him. You were being nice and he did not want any part of it.