Today, I discovered that if you are being mugged, never tell your mugger you are going to call the police because he will come back and steal your phone too. FML
Collection
Fall
Dead leaves, the first cold of the season and an umbrella flipped inside out: fall, the season of grace.
Today, I was mugged. I saw a cop car in the aftermath and flagged it down. Unfortunately, when the cops stopped the mugger, he said he'd been running away because I tried to mug him. Apparently the fact that he was "well-dressed" and I wasn't means he was telling the truth. FML
Today, I got mugged. As the guys who took my purse were about to walk away, my cellphone rang in my pocket. FML
Today, a stranger asked to borrow my phone since his had died. As he was using it, he kept walking away and I had to chase him because he was walking too far. He turned around, yelled, "Stop following me, asshole!" and punched me, knocking me out cold. When I came to, I realized the fucker stole my phone. FML
Today, I got mugged. After taking my cell phone, the guy politely said: "Thanks. Have a nice evening. Be careful on your way home." FML
Today, someone tried to mug me. I panicked and ran. As they chased me with their knife out, I heard a slip and a shout behind me but kept running. Six blocks later I was spotted, arrested, and held for questioning by the police. The mugger fell, stabbed themselves, and told a cop that I did it. FML
Today, while going to work, I was mugged. On the way back, I was mugged. FML
Today, a man tried to mug me. I actually apologized to him for not having my wallet on me. FML
Today, I saved a woman from being mugged, and stayed with her until the police arrived. At which point she ignored me completely, and thanked the handsome 20-something police officer for making her feel safe, like I did nothing. Ungrateful cow. Next time the mugger can have your handbag. FML
Today, while I was walking to my car, I was mugged. Not only did they take my phone, wallet and watch, the extra few minutes taken in my journey meant that when I got to my car, I was given a parking ticket. FML
Today, my place of work was robbed. When expressing worry that the thieves would return, the cops told us, and I quote, "If they come back and attack you, just give us a call back." Fucking stellar, thanks. FML
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Top comments
RetardedBullFrog 4
"Imma call the cops !!! . . . when I get home . . ."
tylersign 11
*mugger steals landline*
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Comments (166)
gun_pilot 0
That's what a CCW is for.
MarjoCupcake 11
I would reccomend not saying you're going to tell your mum either. He'd take her as well. ;)
brina53 4
Lucky he didn't do worse to u
hateevryone 15
you really had that coming. never say you're going to call the police to a criminal.
HunterAlpha1 8
YDI for not carrying a pistol. the only reason criminals get away with crime is because their victims are unarmed.
waynenight 4
#155 is completely ignorant. It is better not to have guns in the world because all they're gonna do is just cause more problems. Until you are on my level #155... keep dreamin'.
d10cat 0
O my nobody to have guns what world do you live in. Tell u what smarty I teach CHL in Tx bet my students handle a situation better than you do. Especially when a man puts a gun in your face and since your not jackie chan what's gonna scared him away your tears. I bet to top it off your a liberal or a democrat no guns.
gymbabey7 3
no shit sherlock
IslandLove 0
Wow ur smart...
BBDanglez 0
Now he's going to come to your house and steal your computer! I guess they just never learn...
d10cat 0
Sorry for your luck in Tx we have CHLs you should look into getting one.
allaemi 1
It's called the "Run and call technique!!" Not "Yell and then get robbed again technique!" Damn!!! You totally deserve it(: