Dlord357
United States
Today, I had to deliver pizza to a nudist colony. I got an eyeful of more than I needed to see. FML
Collection
Fall
Dead leaves, the first cold of the season and an umbrella flipped inside out: fall, the season of grace.
Same thing different taste
scarred for life
Brampton, Canada
Today, as a pizza delivery guy, I was forced to see yet another naked 200 pound teenage girl with a serious case of body acne. They're starting to give me nightmares. FML
Anonymous
Like the beginning of a porno
Today, my girlfriends dared me to answer the door naked to the cute pizza delivery guy. He laughed it off and thanked me for the awesome tip. An hour later, police arrived because my nosy, frigid, couldn’t-get-laid-in-a-brothel neighbour reported me for public indecency. FML
Pouponette
France
Today, the pizza delivery guy saw me in my underwear. My boyfriend is so ashamed of me that he pointed out to the guy twice that we were just roommates. FML
Anonymous
Denmark
Today, I saw a naked man for the first time in my life. It was the nude model in my art class. I was forced to draw wrinkles and fat rolls in places I didn't even know existed. FML
anonymous
Netherlands
Today, I witnessed a series of nude old people cycling in the city. I was eating. FML
Anonymous
United States
Today, my girlfriend and I were exchanging some naughty pictures. I accidentally sent one to everybody on my contacts, including my ex, my boss, and even Pizza Hut. FML
omfgwhywhywhy
United States
Deliverude
Today, I had to take a delivery to a known hoarder. I was braced for the sight of the house, but not the naked fat guy and the smell of dead cat when he answered the door. To top it off, they didn't even tip me. FML
Anonymous
Truro, Canada
Today, my friends dared me to answer the door naked for the pizza guy. I heard the doorbell but when I answered, it was the little boy from next door participating in a fundraiser. FML
Roger Quimble
Check this out
Today, after taking a refreshing shower, I found out that due to a newly-built platform, people in the apartment underneath can see right into my bedroom. While I was standing there completely naked, some guy smiled at me. FML
vanorav
Santa Clarita, United States
Today, I walked into the kitchen to eat some breakfast. I got a full visual of my drunk neighbor dancing naked in my backyard. FML
Top comments
Epsilonyx 15
I bet their tip wasn't in cash.
andrew8795 0
I guess there was extra sausage in that order
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Comments (179)
sikhawk 4
first you jelly?
Epsilonyx 15
I bet their tip wasn't in cash.
DontModMeDammit 10
Would you like some ranch with your sausage pizza?
Lanceeden 12
*cough* "No, sir. There are no anchovies on this pizza. That fishy smell must be something else."
LiyIa_fml 8
If they were attractive why are you complaining? If they wern't...... I'm sorry OP.
urdirtyolduncle 15
I never had a female prizza deliverer.
indianguyinuk 12
wow....they have colonies now
rawrkittyrawr 6
Brings a whole new meaning to sausage fest.... Oh wait no it doesn't
wegetrz 14
I've never had prizza..
cfalen 0
Pizza guy: "Yea I have a pizza for Ben Dover" Nudist: ;)
cfalen 0
I mean pizza girl
JustHello123 1
Why the hell do people do that??
Leftoverjello 6
As a general rule, nudists are old, fat and ugly. At least on the east coast.
asoptavlo14 6
But on the west coast they are sexy and fine.
ScaughtieHolden 11
37, what do you mean NOW they have nudist colonies? That's what they've always been called..
Choose_Wisely 5
why is it that most nudists are older?
zbean 0
just like you ODed on tanning....
ohSNAPyall 27
It's my dick in a box!
Xx_Dakota_xX 1
No no no its Pizza Guy ("Jim"): I got a pizza delivery for a "ranch on ur sausage" Nudist: *poker face*
Xx_Dakota_xX 1
No no no its Pizza Guy ("Jim"): I got a pizza delivery for a "ranch on ur sausage" Nudist: *poker face*
daminantion 14
I see what you did there :P
jellitonoctopus 19
32: what does attractiveness have to do with anything?
ithilaelin 0
Today, our pizza delivery guy had clothes on. My children are scarred for life...FML
andrew8795 0
I guess there was extra sausage in that order
13FTW 9
OP will never see pepperoni in the same light.
TheDeadlyTurtle 7
It's a good thing u can't get a boner haha,
cjguthrie 8
Yesss hahaha
Potterhead1 3
At least OP can use Obliviate to wipe the experience from her memory.
siickman 7
Dude thts awesome.... Wait mostly guys right? ... Nvm i take it back
leadman1989 16
I'm guessing the problem is that they're old. Old people just don't give a ****!
siickman 7
Yea lol
jpest17 5
Op is a girl...
pleasebitch_fml 0
Ha!!
canjeelo 0
Yo I think you're a nudist
Lanceeden 12
Hopefully your nickname isn't now Dickeye like that other FMLer.
ohmyhotdogonabun 0
Haha I remember that one
StopDropNRoll 11
No shit it's less than 2 days old
chickenwalrus 14
no it's dlord, as in dicklord.
FreshlyCut 0
97-worst comment. Not even funny.....
mrme442 1
A bit affective to fml??
Epsilonyx 15
Guys, I think OP's insinuating that they got an eyeful of semen.
DynamicDave 11
I moderated this, and it said "old lady ******... Ew." I think it got edited before being posted.
hottiebrunette 0
One time my taxi driver's name was Semen.
raymaster1103 6
What the hell?
hottiebrunette 0
Yeah he was indian
perdix 31
Usually, people in nudist colonies are the people for whom clothing was invented in the first place! I'll bet the OP is not going to be able to look at pepperoni the same way again...or cottage cheese.
doughertyz 1
Lol can someone say yeast infection? ;D
Lanceeden 12
^ yeast infection.
KiddNYC1O 22
Goat cheeeese.
perdix 31
Not Goatse cheese?
RuskiManBearPig 4
76-perdix, after reading that comment I dub you the king of bosses.
THE_A_TEEN 28
The upside for you is that you get to see free pootang and boobies. The downside for you is that you get to see some dick and balls. Consider yourself semi-lucky/unlucky.
perdix 31
Unless the OP was a lesbian, the upside/downside equation would be reversed. Of course, women don't think it's a treat to see the cocks and balls of disgusting men (otherwise, I'd be a flasher;) )
DanLikesDodge 5
Just to make things straight...uhm...op is a girl
THE_A_TEEN 28
Which brings us to a girls point of view. You get to see some good male genitalia, or boobies and some pootang. Also it depends if there are some nice looking or old, fat, (etc.) people. But hey it's what you like. ;) Made the correction.
Daralea 21
genitalia in a nudist colony is rarely "good"
Anubyte 0
All the sexy nudists are strippers, the bad ones go here :/
HomeAl0ne 20
This is why a pizza delivery person is like a gynecologist - they can look all they like, but they can't eat.
FreshlyCut 0
If your bi-sexual you get the best of both worlds.
lmao4evah 0
Some ppl need to keep their mouth shut
You_Need_Soap 6
A-TEEN, stop! Just stop.
Freeze_fml 17
An attractive nudist is rare.
spacemanspiff78 7
Its amazing how the thought of a nudist colony is paradise, but the reality is somewhere between disappointing and disgusting
pdHbq 2
Your profile pic is sooo mean And sooo friggin hilairious!!!