Today, I desperately needed to pee, so I decided to confront my anxiety issues and use a public toilet. I opened the lid, only to see several huge, rancid floaters staring back at me. I had an attack, started sobbing, and pissed myself on the way home. Never again. FML
Collection
Halloween
A failed costume, stolen candy and a very real scare: Halloween, the one night when fear is allowed.
Today, I had to take a dump at work. I walked into the bathroom and opened a stall, only to find what I can only describe as a fecal crime scene. It was like a turd had exploded mid-air. It was so vile, my anxiety kicked in and I broke down into a sobbing panic attack. FML
Today, despite my fear of using public restrooms, I was forced to anyway to avoid my bladder exploding. I was finally getting over it when someone stuck their head under the stall to "see if someone's in there". I'm scared more now than I was before. FML
Today, I was hit with a sudden urge to shit. I knew it was going to be a bad one, so I ran out of the meeting. I made it to the toilet in time, but I forgot to lift the lid. FML
Today, I was using a mall bathroom. Thinking the toilet seat had to be unsanitary, I decided to squat. I was a little farther out than I thought, and ended up peeing all over the bathroom floor. FML
Today, I really had to go to the bathroom. Due to my fear of public restrooms, I made sure it was clear before I started. I heard someone sigh halfway through. Embarrassed, I waited a full ten minutes before leaving the stall, only to see that it was only the automatic air freshener. FML
Today, while in the airport waiting to board, I got the sudden urge to pee, so I ran to the bathroom feeling like my bladder was about to burst. I was so focused on relieving my bladder that I failed to notice the diarrhea covering the toilet seat and the wall behind it until I was sitting in it. FML
Today, I was taking the biggest shit of my life. When I worked the thing out, it hit the water with such force that I got a toilet water enema from the backwash. I was so freaked out that I screamed and fell off the seat, prompting my husband to rush in to see what was wrong. FML
Today, after a shopping trip, I had the worst diarrhea attack and almost shat my pants before I could even get in the front door. By the time I could get the door open, it was taking all of my self-control to keep from shitting myself. I had to shit on the toilet with the front door and bathroom door wide open. FML
Today, I thought I was going to shit myself at work. I speed-walked all the way to the bathroom clenching for dear life. Barely got my pants down while simultaneously sitting and unleashing. After all that, it was just a gigantic fart. FML
Today, I was at work at my local hospital. I went to the toilet to empty my bladder; the door was half open so I assumed it was empty. Upon opening the door, I was greeted with a half naked old man, who then yelled at me and violently shat himself, all over the walls and floor. FML
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Top comments
TheDrifter 24
Good idea, flee and leave them for the next poor sucker to deal with.
Miss_Attitude96 24
I don't understand how hard it is for people to flush the toilet. Seriously, I am a junior in high school and there are disgusting girls that leave their used pads and tampons in the toilets. It's gross.
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Comments (135)
goose12321 11
Automatic flushers ftw
breezyblue33 19
I wouldn't go to a toilet with the lid down in the first place...There's almost always bound to be a surprise in there! :/
MandieL 27
They say when you need to pee bad with no where to go, to think of sex. This temporarily switches the need sensation in your brain from having to pee.
Rascal93 7
despite how funny this is, I also have a slight fear of toilets.. I dont EVER sit, i squat
theboy13 13
Get over it... That's why girls hover...or also use layers of seat covers
Xxblackice 13
yea you got a good point there buddy how'd you know from logging over 2000 hours of **** voyeur videos
freshprizzle1 13
Protip: when using a public toilet, if possible, flush before opening the lid and using the facilities.
NagainaFier 16
Should have just gone behind a tree, OP.
ErictheRed 5
That fml was awesome! Lol.
Bootrick 11
Grow up.
Jennidoll 2
okay I have REAL ANXIETY WHICH IS NOT TIED TO ANYTHING AND IS RANDOM. you have a PHOBIA WHICH CAN BE CURED BY FORCING A PERSON TO DO SAID THING OVER AND OVER. anxiety is not tied to any specific situation. I would know I am a psychology student specializing in abnormal psychology. (anxiety, phobias, schizophrenia, etc.) so I really don't feel bad for you because you're just unwilling to do what you need to to get over your phobia. I can't do anything to get over my anxiety you're lucky and you should realize that. I'm actually pissed off that so many people feel bad for you when this could be fixed relatively easily and quickly.
Aspireworks 12
Oh, first year psych students!
xatharon 1
You are an asshole. This person said they had anxiety issues, she did not say what kind. Miss know it all that you are can not even read properly. Stop pretending you know psychology and start studying, then maybe you will learn to pay attention and that each case is different. She has anxiety, she may not have seen a doctor or she may have and they cannot help her as in your case. I understand the problem also and sometimes you just want to escape and try something, you should know that, if you really have anxiety.