Today, I caught my ex trying to slash my car tires with a knife. She actually had the balls to claim she was testing my tire pressure, before power-walking off into the distance like nothing had happened. FML
Collection
Halloween
A failed costume, stolen candy and a very real scare: Halloween, the one night when fear is allowed.
Same thing different taste
Overboard
Today, the disgruntled ex-boyfriend of a woman who lives three floors down from me slashed her tires for breaking up with him. He also, for good measure, slashed the tires of the person parked to the left and right of her. I was parked to the right of her. FML
Spare
Today, one of my tires blew out on the highway. I managed to slow down and pull over without dying, and went to get my spare tire. I found it right where it was supposed to be, knifed to hell and with a taunting note from my psycho ex taped to it. We broke up nearly 3 years ago. FML
Today, I broke up with my boyfriend because he has anger issues. Tonight, my tires were slashed. FML
Y'all better run
Today, my psycho ex showed up at my doorstep to beg me to take her back, so I pulled my gun on her. I just found out she's pressing charges. FML
What the F, lady?
Today, the girl I went on an awkward date with two weeks ago showed up at university and started smashing my car with a bat. She then broke down in tears and alternated between declaring her love, and cussing me out for "cheating" on her. FML
What a coincidence
Today, after two months of being broken up, and my ex still insisting she hadn't been cheating on me, I declared via text my intention to burn the rest of her stuff in the yard. This resulted in the guy she "hadn't been cheating on me with" kicking in my door. FML
Everything everywhere all at one
Today, I blew a tire without money for a spare, had to have my ex come get my kids, drove home on three tires, and possibly fucked things up with my girlfriend beyond repair. My girlfriend is the only person keeping me sane, and I might lose her. FML
Don't look back
Today, out of pure desperation and loneliness, I went out with my ex-boyfriend. It ended with him hitting me and driving off with my car. He's in jail now. What was I thinking? FML
High value male
Today, my ex claimed she missed me and asked me to come back, but when I gave her a polite and firm no, she turned nasty and keyed my car. Apparently, what she actually missed was someone mug enough to pay 2/3 of the household bills, while looking after her badly behaved brat whenever she didn't want to. FML
Pros and cons
Today, my ex stole my car keys. Good news is she can't drive stick. Bad news is she set my car on fire. FML
Top comments
_Domster_46 16
Report it to the police and get a restraining order, that bitch sounds crazy to me!
cutycat136 28
Keep an eye out. She might be back to try that again op.
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Comments (83)
alexlots 20
What a psycho
KingOfTheLosers 7
she actually had the balls? man you are into some kinky females or should I say shemales..?
gearhead369 20
Haha what a crazy gearhead369!!
barlos88 19
Tell her that she'll be testing the distance of a restraining order if she pulls that shit again
munchly 17
That's how I always check my tire pressure :P
Sqaud00 17
Looks like her car needs a check up too.
MrConcise 35
"Power-walking...like nothing had happened"? Seems pretty contradictory.
wakemeupplease 21
time to pack and leave the town crazy ex gf got a knife
fakedsincerity 32
holy shit. be careful. stuff like that tends to escalate especially if they get away with it the first time.
worldclassrager 41
Got a buddy that can hold your car in their garage so you don't have to worry about it?