Today, I caught my ex trying to slash my car tires with a knife. She actually had the balls to claim she was testing my tire pressure, before power-walking off into the distance like nothing had happened. FML
Collection
Fall
Dead leaves, the first cold of the season and an umbrella flipped inside out: fall, the season of grace.
Today, the disgruntled ex-boyfriend of a woman who lives three floors down from me slashed her tires for breaking up with him. He also, for good measure, slashed the tires of the person parked to the left and right of her. I was parked to the right of her. FML
Today, one of my tires blew out on the highway. I managed to slow down and pull over without dying, and went to get my spare tire. I found it right where it was supposed to be, knifed to hell and with a taunting note from my psycho ex taped to it. We broke up nearly 3 years ago. FML
Today, I broke up with my boyfriend because he has anger issues. Tonight, my tires were slashed. FML
Today, my psycho ex showed up at my doorstep to beg me to take her back, so I pulled my gun on her. I just found out she's pressing charges. FML
Today, the girl I went on an awkward date with two weeks ago showed up at university and started smashing my car with a bat. She then broke down in tears and alternated between declaring her love, and cussing me out for "cheating" on her. FML
Today, after two months of being broken up, and my ex still insisting she hadn't been cheating on me, I declared via text my intention to burn the rest of her stuff in the yard. This resulted in the guy she "hadn't been cheating on me with" kicking in my door. FML
Today, I blew a tire without money for a spare, had to have my ex come get my kids, drove home on three tires, and possibly fucked things up with my girlfriend beyond repair. My girlfriend is the only person keeping me sane, and I might lose her. FML
Today, out of pure desperation and loneliness, I went out with my ex-boyfriend. It ended with him hitting me and driving off with my car. He's in jail now. What was I thinking? FML
Today, my ex claimed she missed me and asked me to come back, but when I gave her a polite and firm no, she turned nasty and keyed my car. Apparently, what she actually missed was someone mug enough to pay 2/3 of the household bills, while looking after her badly behaved brat whenever she didn't want to. FML
Today, my ex stole my car keys. Good news is she can't drive stick. Bad news is she set my car on fire. FML
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Top comments
_Domster_46 16
Report it to the police and get a restraining order, that bitch sounds crazy to me!
cutycat136 28
Keep an eye out. She might be back to try that again op.
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Comments (83)
JKPwnage 27
Call her on her shit.
mellib381 15
Would do this to my asshole ex but ex doesn't drive?
Spadoinkle 10
The whole power walking into the distance thing cracked me up. I am glad that you caught her at it before she was able to slash your tires, though. Tires are too damn expensive.
jay0627 8
Get a Restraining order
NobodyGay 16
She actually didn't have the balls to do anything. ......... because she's a female, dumbass.
fabcade 14
better call the cops
THEDUDE1553566 24
Call the police...also check to see if she slashed your brake lines as well
Cassandra2015 21
i take it that the breakup didn't go so well ..
kattykat1 13
Was your gf a she make? O.o cause you said she has balls..
Boren 11
Call the Cops the end