Today, I came to work ready to impress my boss. A couple of weeks ago I asked him for a promotion from stock to sales and I have been proving myself worthy. Turns out he hired a new girl for sales, with great, big, fake breasts. FML
Collection
Halloween
A failed costume, stolen candy and a very real scare: Halloween, the one night when fear is allowed.
Today, my coworker and I agreed to come clean and tell our fellow employees that we have been secretly dating for a while. Before we could, I received a promotion. I'm now his boss. FML
Today, during my shift at a restaurant, my boss's daughter came in. I couldn't help but notice that she was almost popping out of her low-cut top. After having a private chat with her, my boss took me aside and said, "My daughter's got eyes you know, not just a pair of tits". FML
Today, my co-worker came back from Thailand with big new breasts. She told me to go ahead and touch them because they have a funny texture for the first few months. When our GM entered the room, I had both hands down my co-worker's shirt, agreeing that they were unnaturally firm. FML
Today, my girlfriend got the breast implants she's been wanting for the last 5 years. When I went to pick her up at the hospital she said, "Maybe I can find a guy with a real job now!" I paid for her fake tits. FML
Today, I walked in on my boss masturbating in the supply room of our restaurant. I pretended I didn't see him and quickly closed the door. About five minutes later, he came out, cupped my face in his hands and told me I was getting promoted. I'm happy, but scarred for life. FML
Today, my boss was fired by the board. A few days ago, he dropped several strong hints that he was going to promote me soon. FML
Today, my boss told me I got my new job because she rejected candidates that seemed "too confident" or "too pretty." FML
Today, I found out that a co-worker of mine that I had originally hired, trained, and mentored to work in my department for the past 4 years had just got the promotion that I had applied for. He is now my boss. FML
Today, I finally started my dream job. I turned up for work with a huge smile on my face. Imagine how much my face dropped when I saw that I had to share an office with the girl I stood up last weekend. FML
Today, the CEO of my company leaned over and said, "Hey, I've been meaning to thank you…" I thought he was going to thank me for all of my hard work, but he continued, "…for wearing that shirt today. I can totally see your boobs." FML
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Top comments
iGotBieberFever 0
Find a better job ! Then he'll be begging for you to come back ! FYL
Talez 0
sucks to be you
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Comments (171)
Viraten 0
YDI for having small boobs.
Football_5tar_JR 0
YDI for thinking this would happen. Your boss is the boss for reason, he makes the right decisions. Jk sorry OP but seriously, what a boss.
whatsgoodman 0
last time I checked I swear it wasn't good to ASK your boss for a promotion..ydi
bent80 0
get a boob job n quit whining.
NickTM 0
Have you thought that she might just be promoted on merit?
michybaby7 0
maybe you should get great, big, fake breast. at least you'd get noticed. or you can assert yourself....idk, whatever floats your boat.
nerdsgetmehot 23
Your boss sounds like a superficial jerk. :(
Crono943 6
geneally women with big fake breasts are better at sales...
triggerit 5
boobs rule ...
wwe_fanatic 0
Enormous genitals conquer all
nerdsgetmehot 23
#138 Technically breasts aren't genitals. But definition, genitals are "the sex organs in the pelvic area of both men and women."
TheIrishJaneDoe 9
Yeah... in this case, I'm guessing that having an enormous vag would have the opposite effect than intended.