Today, I came to work ready to impress my boss. A couple of weeks ago I asked him for a promotion from stock to sales and I have been proving myself worthy. Turns out he hired a new girl for sales, with great, big, fake breasts. FML
Collection
Fall
Dead leaves, the first cold of the season and an umbrella flipped inside out: fall, the season of grace.
Today, my coworker and I agreed to come clean and tell our fellow employees that we have been secretly dating for a while. Before we could, I received a promotion. I'm now his boss. FML
Today, during my shift at a restaurant, my boss's daughter came in. I couldn't help but notice that she was almost popping out of her low-cut top. After having a private chat with her, my boss took me aside and said, "My daughter's got eyes you know, not just a pair of tits". FML
Today, my co-worker came back from Thailand with big new breasts. She told me to go ahead and touch them because they have a funny texture for the first few months. When our GM entered the room, I had both hands down my co-worker's shirt, agreeing that they were unnaturally firm. FML
Today, my girlfriend got the breast implants she's been wanting for the last 5 years. When I went to pick her up at the hospital she said, "Maybe I can find a guy with a real job now!" I paid for her fake tits. FML
Today, I walked in on my boss masturbating in the supply room of our restaurant. I pretended I didn't see him and quickly closed the door. About five minutes later, he came out, cupped my face in his hands and told me I was getting promoted. I'm happy, but scarred for life. FML
Today, my boss was fired by the board. A few days ago, he dropped several strong hints that he was going to promote me soon. FML
Today, my boss told me I got my new job because she rejected candidates that seemed "too confident" or "too pretty." FML
Today, I found out that a co-worker of mine that I had originally hired, trained, and mentored to work in my department for the past 4 years had just got the promotion that I had applied for. He is now my boss. FML
Today, I finally started my dream job. I turned up for work with a huge smile on my face. Imagine how much my face dropped when I saw that I had to share an office with the girl I stood up last weekend. FML
Today, the CEO of my company leaned over and said, "Hey, I've been meaning to thank you…" I thought he was going to thank me for all of my hard work, but he continued, "…for wearing that shirt today. I can totally see your boobs." FML
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Top comments
iGotBieberFever 0
Find a better job ! Then he'll be begging for you to come back ! FYL
Talez 0
sucks to be you
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Comments (171)
xxtheman15xx 0
Get faker and bigger boobs.
maddiester 5
ydi for being yourself.
stephx11 0
haha suckssss :P
Agamemnon_fml 0
lmao #53 that was amazing I friggen love the Seinfeld reference
iWearTightPants 0
that's common sense dude;D physically attractive woman OR summ guy?? >D Boobies>hard working man xD haha thumps up 2 ur boss OP! we need more sexually attractive woman in the work place;D hehe having huge boobies is a plus;)<3 hehe ^________^
GiRDEELU 0
so? lol I'm 14 and I'm already a C
cc1992 11
What a surprise! He's just a typical sex-driven male I suppose. Well, when she lets him down, maybe you'll get the spot, but still this sucks for you :(
LaDyBlOo 0
Ughhh I hate guys like that I had a boss who always flirted with me and would say nice ass once I would walk out the door I fukin Quit that job!
moneypenny_fml 0
there's no arguing with a nice ass...
ThatBrownChick 0
people nowadays are only reliant on looks. tsk tsk tsk. it's about the job ethic, not the size of your boobies ^.^
howareyoulard 0
I would just tell that new girl, some horrible lie about your boss, something that would make her want to quit, lol, then maybe he'll come runnin back to you, seeing as how patheic he seems like