Today, I came home to find my eight-year-old son had basically set fire to the kitchen, after trying to practice some kind of stupid shit he'd seen on TV called "fire bending." FML
Collection
Fall
Dead leaves, the first cold of the season and an umbrella flipped inside out: fall, the season of grace.
Today, my son watched some ridiculous Japanese cartoon about shokugeki cooking and is convinced he's the greatest cook ever by copying what happens in the show. He set fire to my frying pan, panicked, and dumped it in the ceramic sink, which cracked from the heat and flooded my kitchen. FML
Today, I had to take my son to the ER after he badly messed up trying to light his farts on fire. FML
Today, I watched on camera as my son tried to light a bonfire and set fire to my shed. Props to him, he ran to get my mini fire extinguisher from the car, but he pulled the pin then THREW THE EXTINGUISHER INTO THE FIRE. The dumb SOB thought mini extinguishers worked like grenades. FML
Today, my wife and I had a huge fight that ended with her taking my son and going to her mother's. What happened? I caught him playing with the knobs on the GAS STOVE for the third time and spanked him for it. He's been told not to play with those many times already, and I'm scared he's gonna start a fire. FML
Today, my son decided he wanted roasted marshmallows. It would've been fine, except he put the entire bag into the oven I had preheating for pizza and caught it on fire. FML
Today, when I got home, I learned that my five year-old had tried to burn the house down when my wife told him that he needed to stop watching TV. Now we need a counselor and it's going to cost thousands. FML
Today, my dad set my hair on fire while cooking. He then tried to convince me that it spontaneously combusted. FML
Today, my teenage daughter nearly burned down our house because she wanted to take "artsy" pictures with a lighter for Instagram. FML
Today, I made the mistake of taking apart and fixing a malfunctioning toaster in front of my five year-old. Two hours later, he tried to take apart a lamp that was plugged in. He shocked himself, broke the lamp, and set the carpet on fire. FML
Today, I found out my 10 year-old step-brother has an obsession with fire, after he burnt all the belongings in my room, including a £600 guitar. FML
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Top comments
dino_cookie4 7
Thats avatar. I always liked that show when o was young though.
FlamingTacos 7
So he's a water bender?
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Comments (387)
jayhawkchik 4
So,How does it feel to know that your 8 year old is way cooler than you?
Pikachu17 13
I was going to say that yeah your life sucked....but you insulted firebending
OhYeahItsDannie 0
Tell him to be a water bender instead
wier0901 1
Why the hell is an 8-year-old home alone to begin with?
Mahtari 19
Stupid shit? Kill yourself.
l0v3p4in 7
He's 8 years old - still in elementary school. Once the kitchen's fixed and the bills are paid, it'll be a hilarious story to tell at the next family together.
TheyCallMeDamien 18
No more Last Airbender for him.
xsweetlikeux 6
First of all avatar is the best show ever and a CARTOON if your son is stupid enough to think firebending is real then I'm questioning why u left him home alone in the first place
raraisbang 12
Everyone that asks why he was left alone is jumping to a rather dumb conclusion. I assumed he had a bad babysitter - I highly doubt the kid put the fire out himself and obviously the fire department didn't becaus if they'd come and an 8 year old was alone, cps would've most likely been called. Think before assuming
miyaviichan 27
What a coincidence, my boyfriend and I started an Avatar marathon when this FML was posted.
SnipeFatPeople 6
Avatar isnt stupid shit...