Today, I came home from work to my 4-year old daughter cussing left and right. I asked her about it; she said that her brother had taught her some words. When I confronted him about the situation, he kicked my shin and screamed, "Stop treating me like a fucking child!" He's 5. FML
Collection
Halloween
A failed costume, stolen candy and a very real scare: Halloween, the one night when fear is allowed.
Same thing different taste
Not her fault nor mine
Today, my 4 year-old daughter got royally annoyed at my uncle who won't stop surprise tickling her by poking her waist. When he went for another, she punched him square on the nose, making him a laughing stock. Not accepting that he got owned, he started preaching about child discipline to me. FML
This boy
Today, I was babysitting a four year-old. He was mad and began hitting me. I told him to use his words not his fists when he's mad. He then began telling me how much he hated me, and that I should go die and never come back. FML
Today, I overheard my 5 year old daughter call a girl in her dance class a slut. Shocked, I asked her where she heard that word. Her response: "I heard you and Daddy say it about her Mommy." FML
Little shit
Today, I was asked to take care of my 3 year-old little brother. After 15 minutes of him screaming and me trying to keep him entertained, he started throwing his toy cars at me. He hit me in the mouth, and I started to bleed. My parents yelled at me for "not controlling him." FML
Learning moment
Today, I was babysitting my 6-year-old brother and was playing Mario. When I won, he called me a cunt. I was in shock and asked him where he learnt the word. He said from me when I was driving. He then told my mum that I taught him a new word. Easy to say, I'm in big trouble. FML
Today, my son trained his little sister to walk up to strangers and whimper: "My mommy punches me." FML
Wise kid
Today, I had to give my four year-old daughter some tough love, which I hate doing. When she ran away crying, my son, her twin brother, looked at me and said, "You should be ashamed of yourself." FML
Today, I was watching my 3 year old brother. He asked me to get him a cookie and I said, "What's the magic word?" He looked at me angrily and said "Bitch, please." FML
Today, I grounded my son after finding out that he's been bullying other kids at school. He got mad and screamed at me, calling me a "bastard". Instead of defending me, my wife got pissed and accused me of having taught our son to swear like that. I can never win. FML
Lock him up!
Today, my five-year-old son threatened to kill another kid at school. I told the teacher I would have a talk with my son about how that’s not okay. The teacher replied that I’d better call the cops in case he “follows through.” Did I mention the kid is five? FML
Top comments
lambda_fml 40
You cant blame it completely on the child. You being his parent are responsible for his development.
CareFace 16
Kids these days grow up so fast...
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Comments (216)
ninaskyez 12
Can you say anger issues!
Bunny21 11
Seems to me like it's time for you to educate yourself on how to educate your children before it's too late.
wuzuppipol_fml 2
Need heart to heart talk...
audreyfml1994 15
And that's when you ask your 5 year old son where HE got it from and then crack the whip on the source.
Blurgas 16
I was going to tick "I agree", but then I had to ask myself what kind of dingbat lets their 5 year old get that bad in the first place.
msmedieval 11
I remember saying something like that once to my dad when I was a preteen & got slapped on the mouth. Never disrespected him again. You might want to use a different approach but as the parent, it's your responsibility to raise them right.
teemooegan 9
By any chance is your son Stewie?
fakkumairaifu 14
Time for a beating.
gravekill3r 1
B**** slap that kid
daniellenb22 4
umm u need better parenting skills maybe you should read a book