Today, I bought the girl I like a bouquet of roses saying "Anonymous" on it, and left it on her front porch. She saw it, and called the guy she thought it was from. He said, "You're welcome!" and now they're going out. FML
Collection
Fall
Dead leaves, the first cold of the season and an umbrella flipped inside out: fall, the season of grace.
Today, I bought myself a flower for Valentine's Day to be delivered to myself from "Anonymous". FML
Today, I sent the girl I like flowers, only to have her later post a picture of them online, saying, "Ha! When losers send you flowers." FML
Today, my girlfriend came home with a huge bouquet of roses. They were from an admirer, brainwashing her to think I'm a terrible boyfriend for not buying her flowers like he did. FML
Today, I bought my crush a bouquet of roses plus one fake. The line was going to be, "I'll stop loving you when the last rose dies." I told my best friend and he thought it was such an amazing idea that he stole the fake rose and gave it to her himself. Guess who got the girl. FML
Today, I sent a guy in my English class a rose. He's kind of an outcast, so I though it would be a nice gesture. I asked him later how his day was going and he said, "Good. I got a rose this morning, but I could tell it was from a guy. The handwriting was awful." FML
Today, just so my family would think someone might actually be interested in me, I bought myself roses and attached a secret admirer card to them. My plan would have worked if I hadn't forgotten to take the receipt off the kitchen counter. FML
Today, I bought some flowers. As I was checking out, the cashier asked, "Aww, these for your mom? How sweet." I responded they were for a girl I liked. She laughed and said, "Sorry…" FML
Today, I got flowers from a secret admirer. Turns out they were from my sister's in-laws who own a flower shop. Apparently, everyone feels bad that I'm single and they are convinced I'm gonna die alone. FML
Today, I decided to be playful and leave my girlfriend flowers and chocolates from an "Anonymous Admirer". She immediately dumped me, saying she couldn't be with someone who "isn't even as romantic as a stranger". Yep, I think I just got dumped for myself. FML
Today, I resorted to buying some expensive flowers and sending them to my boss anonymously with a mysterious love letter, just to get her to lighten the hell up and stop constantly harassing and berating me over every little thing. FML
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Top comments
g00nie 0
You kind of deserve it. Why didn't you just go out on a limb and sign your name?
theanonymoose 3
Well if you're too afraid to take a chance with her and have to give her a gift behind anonymity, YDI.
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Comments (107)
EmoScreamer1717 0
You are stupid.
DeafWolverine 8
if i were you, id get revenge by showing her the receipt..you do still have it dont you?
manaallovesfmls 19
Your fault for writing anonymous.
efelsh 14
Next time have the balls to say it was you.
SgtBlacksmith 9
Dumbass
wingedelephants 17
I hate it when people falsely take credit for anonymous work, and the same goes for gifts.
MissAbiRose 5
Ask her the next time you see her if she liked the flowers you got her. Her boyfriend will have to explain that one. They may even break up. x
Solano2580 24
Show her the receipt, to prove he is a liar
animeislife 11
why didn't you put your name???
PandaBeer 15
Why didn't you just put his name on it