Today, I borrowed a roommate's car to get groceries. I came out to find the car stolen. I called the cops, and the responding officer took the info and drove me home to give the roomie the bad news in person. 15 minutes later, they found the car. I'd parked it on the opposite side of the lot. FML
Collection
Fall
Dead leaves, the first cold of the season and an umbrella flipped inside out: fall, the season of grace.
Today, I couldn't find my car in a mall parking lot. After 30 minutes of searching, I reported it stolen to the mall security. It turns out that I'd parked it on the opposite side of the mall. Security escorted me to my car, all while giving me pitiful looks. FML
Today, my boss reported to the police that a suspicious car has been parked outside the store late at night. I walked outside and my car was gone. He had my car towed. FML
Today, I found an empty parking space in a crowded parking lot. When I came back later, a lady and a cop were standing by my car. Her car used to be parked there and got stolen. They think I'm involved. FML
Today, my father told me to take the car and get some groceries. An hour and a half later, coming home with the groceries, I see the cops all around my house because my dad had called them, thinking that I had run away and stolen the car. FML
Today, my car was stolen from my driveway. I reported it to the police, the insurance company, and my neighbors, and begged for help via social media. As I walked to catch a bus, I saw my car parked outside my school. I forgot I left it there last night. FML
Today, my brother "borrowed" my car and keys without asking me. He came back 4 hours later, alone and pale faced. It took half an hour of questions, interrogation, and finally threats before he admitted that my car is sitting in a ditch a few miles away, probably totaled. FML
Today, the police called because someone had turned in my wallet that was stolen. I happily drove home only to find that my house had been robbed and ransacked. FML
Today, I finished my shopping at Costco, and realized I'd forgotten where I had parked. After scouring the parking lot for 20 minutes, I called the police and filed a report for a stolen vehicle. I then remembered I had bought a new car yesterday and parked it right next to the entrance. FML
Today, I took the bus after work. When I got to the remote parking lot, I realized my car had been stolen so I called the police to report it. When they came to take a statement and asked me when was the last time I saw my car was, I replied, “This morning, when I drove it to wo… Oh.” FML
Today, I bundled up to shovel my car out of almost 2 feet of snow, only to find my car was gone. I ran into the nearby police station to report my stolen car. The policeman trudged down with me to get a report. I had parked my car on the other side of the street. FML
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Top comments
hihihi002 0
you suck.
jlynn91 0
YDI for using the phrase "find the car stolen". Impossible.
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Comments (81)
lxNDirishxl 0
thats wat the car alarm is for
Neferria 0
How dense are you? Next time, pay attention to where you park first.
Ksoccerplayer 0
double checking is cool..
TheIrishJaneDoe 9
Definitely a guy; check the name, dumbasses. If it was a woman, she'd probably forget to click male AND add "boy" to the name. Memory is obviously not his/her strong suit. However, the OP gets enough bonus points for the use of the word sensecent to make up for the stupidity of calling the cops. Congrats-- you come out even today.
kkhawkins 0
To all those who made comments to the effect that I cannot read, need to check their own reading. I didn't say anything about it being a mistake, I said she was too embarrassed to admit that she is in fact female. And as for being a virgin/single? I am married. Good job further proving how stupid you bitches can really be.
fmlfmlfml15 0
1. so because the OP made a stupid mistake, it obviously means he's a female????? 2. Either you are lying about being married so people would assume that you are a virgin/single, or your wife is an ignorant weakling who you verbally abuse on a daily basis, because she does not see what arrogant sexist bastard you really are. And i hope, if you are really married, that she finally gets some sense and leaves you
Jaina_APO 0
and people wonder why I never let others use my car..
dinosaurrrr 0
Haha wow that just made my day. YDI
dustin1694 0
hey this happens people lose their cars in the walmart parking lot but atleast they look for their cars
aidenkush 0
u fail at life
SickSickSick7511 0
How did you find the car stolen? That's like waking up dead, or turning up missing.