Today, I asked my boyfriend what he wanted for for his birthday in a couple of days. He replied "to be single" and walked out of the room. FML
Collection
Halloween
A failed costume, stolen candy and a very real scare: Halloween, the one night when fear is allowed.
Today, I asked my boyfriend what he was being for Halloween. He said "Single". FML
Today, my boyfriend gave me the best birthday ever, then promptly broke up with me at midnight to get back with his ex, because he "didn't want to ruin my special day." FML
Today, my boyfriend told me to stay home, because he wanted to come by to give me a birthday surprise. Later on, he came by, posted a note, rung the bell and left. The note was a break up note. FML
Today, at exactly midnight, I get a text from my boyfriend saying we were done. I had just seen him 4 hours ago when we were out celebrating my birthday, and asked why he didnt just tell me then. He replies 'I couldn't break up with you on your birthday but i wanted it to be over ASAP' FML
Today, I told my boyfriend of three years that I wanted to get married and have a child within the next five years. He responded by packing up my things and showing me the door. FML
Today, my fiancé told me that after 7 years together, he is no longer in love with me. Shocked and appalled, I asked him if he had anything else to add. "Happy Birthday." FML
Today, my boyfriend told me he wants to break up. But not until after our anniversary tomorrow, because he's already gotten dinner reservations for us. FML
Today, my fiance's divorce was finalized and we went out to dinner to celebrate. I stepped away to use the bathroom, then came back to a note on the table saying, "I'm going to enjoy single life, thanks!" He left me with the bill. FML
Today, it was my birthday. My boyfriend made me breakfast in bed, then we went out shopping, had a picnic, watched a good romcom, had a fancy dinner, and ended the day with great sex. And when the clock struck twelve, he dumped me. FML
Today, I pointed out to my boyfriend how Valentine's day, my birthday, and our one-year anniversary were all coming up in the next few weeks. He then promptly broke up with me. FML
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Top comments
Geiko_fml 0
Wow, what a ******* asshole man. Kind of a rudish way of saying it.
Freeze_fml 17
Then don't post a comment. ******* shit.
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Comments (191)
perdix 31
That should be easy on your budget. I think he's returning you for an exchange to get a better fit.
skyttlz 32
lol
xxdsaa 0
Wow that's rude, but hey, good luck with finding someone who is worth giving a birthday present. Because, obviously, he's not.
andycakes 0
yeahh he's a terrible boyfriend for breaking up with you like that
treesdevin 0
wow & that's how you go out like a G people lol
FFML_314 12
And the word of the day is "succulent."
Freeze_fml 17
Wrong. Today is Wednesday, not Saturday.
Trollz4daLULZ 2
brought to us by the number 42.
nerdsgetmehot 23
#33 I love that word. It's so fun to say for whatever reason...
mandycandy1288 0
wow what an ass. you should either talk to him bout it or if he was really being serious, dump his ass. you deserve better!
rlerke 0
or not, perhaps she's a needy manipulative birch. ever consider that? no you didn't sir.
FFML_314 12
Did you ever consider that they may both be homeless drunks? NO YOU DIDN'T!
Trollz4daLULZ 2
Homeless drunks can't use the interwebz :(
FFML_314 12
I do.
Trollz4daLULZ 2
Liar.
FFML_314 12
Yes.
rlerke 0
yeah, library.
Trollz4daLULZ 2
Pfft, nobody goes to libraries anymore. NOBODY. And if you reply and say that you do, YOU ARE LYING.
FFML_314 12
Ohhh emm gee Trollz! I go to the library twice a week.
FFML_314 12
I volunteer at a library! :]
Trollz4daLULZ 2
You two are lying liars telling lies.
FFML_314 12
Thank you. :] People think I'm a bitch, but I have a softer side.
FFML_314 12
Haha, I never lie! Paul is watching.
Trollz4daLULZ 2
IDI for having ears. :(
varunsolanki89 0
Bad!!
popit789 0
how did yu desirve it??
newmxr 0
damn tht dick
jwwang258 3
lol, pwned
sourgirl101 29
Why did you ask? Don't most guys just want a BJ and pancakes with bacon in the morning?
nebula748 14
HELL EFFIN' YEAH!
2igutierrez31 2
dang i guess he got wht he wntd