Today, during my honeymoon, my wife and I finally went scuba-diving. My nose was too big to fit in the face goggles, so I couldn't go. My wife went without me anyway. FML
Collection
Fall
Dead leaves, the first cold of the season and an umbrella flipped inside out: fall, the season of grace.
Today, I went scuba diving for the first time. The diver took me down some 3 meters and I started showing the thumbs up. He thought I was excited. My breather wasn't working and I was using the sign he told me to use to go up. FML
Today, I arrived for the two-week scuba diving vacation I spent months saving, planning, and looking forward to. Today, I also developed an ear infection and can't scuba dive for 2 weeks. FML
Today, my husband is finally fully recovered from getting decompression sickness during our scuba diving vacation. Today is also the day I snapped my femur in half while skiing. FML
Today, at the public pool, my boyfriend dived from one side to the other. I jumped in to reward him underwater, kissing him everywhere and grabbing his crotch, until I noticed his shorts were different. I surfaced to see that my boyfriend was still far away. FML
Today, I did something I'd always wanted to do: I went swimming with dolphins. It was really fun, until I went to kiss the dolphin, and she slipped her tongue half into my mouth. FML
Today, after an 8-month wait, I went on my big vacation. The beach, the sea, the dive, the jellyfish, the allergic reaction, the hospital. FML
Today, I took my girlfriend skydiving for her birthday. I insisted on joining her to make it a memory for us both, despite my fear of heights. I passed out twice mid-freefall and had to be saved by the instructor both times. FML
Today, we are on our honeymoon, at a beautiful resort, and my wife has been in bed crying for two days. She won't talk to me, and every time I come in, she sobs harder and starts hyperventilating. This can't be a good sign. FML
Today, my wife and I went kayaking for the first time in the ocean. She got seasick and, just before she threw up, leaned over the side and tipped the kayak over. FML
Today, I found out my boyfriend can't swim and we are about to go on a romantic holiday to Zanzibar where all our excursions include water-based activities. His solution is that I just go do them all by myself. FML
Feel like sharing it with the other FML users?
Thanks, your FML was submitted, and will appear in the moderation queue soon!
Top comments
lifecontroller 2
You can get specially made goggles to fit your facial features. I scuba dive so please take my word for it
BaconDave 12
It was their honeymoon, a time to be spent together.
Add a comment · Reply to
You must be logged in to be able to post comments!
Comments (90)
KingFudd 13
You're not for scuba, Leuban?
CoconutMuffin 5
Oh puh-lease. Don't try to get sympathy! You look normal in your picture. Seriously, get over some dumb **** like that, and get your pimp on!!!
saIty 17
Cyrano?
Jas1234 0
Cyrano de Bergerac! "C'est un roc!... c'est un pic!... c'est un cap! Que dis-je c'est un cap? C'est une peninsule!" Turns out you do learn stuff in school...
notverysuperdean 9
I'll take a leap here and say ur Italian or Jewish :)
goshpeople 4
Kinda wonder how many other people will get your comment. I smiled.
goshpeople 4
If I saw this FML in the moderating section, I probably would've clicked yes just for the phrase "face googles".
weezy143_fml 0
haha this is so funny and jw. by any chance are you Jewish
Rainbow_dumpster 28
I don't even want to know what you said, 27. You should be ashamed of yourself. :(
SneakherHead 5
Dumb ass
aragmir 13
if you whine for that, you're gonna have a troublesome marriage. You should give your wife some personal space and learn not to be so selfish
eternalibra 14
googles? lol
jewfro311 0
Ouch, that sucks. Congrtulations though(:
eternalibra 14
I want your boner