Today, at work, I was alone in the breakroom when I got a slight pain in my belly. I thought I needed to pass gas, so I tried since no one else was in there. It wasn't gas. It was diarrhea. I'm wearing a mini skirt today. FML
Collection
Fall
Dead leaves, the first cold of the season and an umbrella flipped inside out: fall, the season of grace.
Today, I thought I was going to shit myself at work. I speed-walked all the way to the bathroom clenching for dear life. Barely got my pants down while simultaneously sitting and unleashing. After all that, it was just a gigantic fart. FML
Today, I tried to let out a small fart in a crowded restaurant. I had diarrhea. I walked past several families to get to the bathroom and clean myself up, only to still go home with a huge wet spot down my ass. My shirt wasn't long enough to hide it. FML
Today, I was at work alone with a stomach bug. For some reason, our bathroom was out of toilet paper, so I had to quickly run to the nearest store to buy more, only to shit my pants midway there. I'm pretty sure the cashier knew exactly what had happened. FML
Today, at work, I felt a sudden, all-too-familiar pain in my stomach. I ran for the restroom, but before I could get there, I shat myself. I had to limp the rest of the way, then beg my boss to let me go home. He said no and told me to get back to work. FML
Today, I had to shit worse than I thought possible at work. I left my desk and hurried towards the bathroom, dropping trou as soon as the door closed. I then tripped over my pant leg, hit my head on the toilet, and came to some minutes later with my ass spewing diarrhea like a volcano. FML
Today, at the ripe age of 29, I pooped my pants. It was a little diarrhea and I had expected it to be a fart, so I quickly had to grab my shorts, waddling to the bathroom, commando. FML
Today, I sharted in work this morning. It was rather unpleasant and everyone around me knew what had happened. The embarrassment was stifling. FML
Today, I was constipated and strained so hard that I threw up into my pants and all over my shoes. I was at work, and no, I didn’t have a change of clothes. FML
Today, for the first time in a while I decided to wear a skirt. Everytime I sit down my thighs trap air and make a farting sound. FML
Today, I felt some serious gas building up while at the supermarket. I tried to quietly fart it out, only to end up sharting myself. I had to frantically waddle out of the store as discreetly as possible as several people in the vicinity freaked out and tried to locate the source of the smell. FML
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Top comments
badboy6865 0
wow. i signed up for an fmylife.com account just so i could say this... HAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHA
jayfx 0
oh my god..
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Comments (173)
such_is_life_fml 0
I'd lol at this, but I was in Disney world, and shit my pants during the day. I was 14, btw xD
atleastimpretty 0
ooooh.......im so sorry....but if it makes you feel better I was on the other end once and had to clean this old broads shit off the floor....(collective **** our lives)
jake_fml 0
zing_master...........i.............hate..........you, i think you need to spend more time on your zings, for you zings, they are fails
DanceOnTheEdge 0
ewww. good luck with that one.
ManWhatsoever 6
I think she needs more than luck ~
soandso 0
I am laughing so hard right now. I'm so sorry.
Vagabones 0
I remember ******** my pants in pre-school. Luckily it was one turdlet instead of a full-out, down the leg waterfall.
monkeybuissness 0
Lolllll turdlet full-blown down the leg lmfao
karma_isah_bitch 0
oh no!! im so sorryyyy!
badboy6865 0
Times i've shit my pants: 1. Preschool- was left by teacher in garbage can 2. Karate Class- kicked a turd out during a high kick 3. Back of Car- had to poop in plastic bag and hold it on the window (it flapped around nicely) 4. In HS- tried to hide it by flushing underwear down toilet...ended up flooding the bathroom... janitor caught me 5. Rollerblading up driveway after a bbq.... my sister found a trail of poop from driveway to garage moral of story--- dont feel bad, it happens! ... some more than others...
Bobdoleomega 0
geez dude you have a problem
iexcell 0
wdf dude
rowanessence 4
Lmao god this is funnier than what happened to OP
PrincessPesa 20
Seriously!! I favorite-d this FML so I could easily find it again. Cracked me up!!
c0c0_fml 16
18! What is wrong with you?!!!! Lol sorry I never laughed so much in my life woww you're something
wheelchairs 0
#6 - NO ONE should do that.
flyawayphoenix 0
Why were you wearing a mini skirt to work?! haha i'm sorry though, that sucks! XD
flighted 1
ive been scrolling down WAITING for somebody to say this.....thank you.