Today, as revenge for being grounded for bullying a kid at school, my eight-year-old son flung a handful of Lego into my path as I walked barefoot into the kitchen. I'm still in pain. FML
Collection
Fall
Dead leaves, the first cold of the season and an umbrella flipped inside out: fall, the season of grace.
Today, the kids I babysit hid from me. While I was looking for them, I stepped on multiple strategically-placed Lego bricks. When I yelped from the pain, the kids jumped out and threw soccer balls in my face. FML
Today, right after preparing a gourmet plate of dry-aged steak with freshly cooked mashed potatoes, I stepped on my son's Lego and dropped my plate. I stood there for 5 minutes, crying. FML
Today, I grounded my son after finding out that he's been bullying other kids at school. He got mad and screamed at me, calling me a "bastard". Instead of defending me, my wife got pissed and accused me of having taught our son to swear like that. I can never win. FML
Today, I slipped on my son's Hot Wheels cars and fell onto a building made out of Lego. I now have a fractured tailbone and a broken wrist. I called my husband to tell him what happened and all he could do was laugh. My son didn't leave them on the floor, my husband did. FML
Today, I jumped up to touch the ceiling, then I landed on one of my younger sibling's Lego. FML
Today, after being fed up with my sarcastic, mouthy daughter, I decided to remove her TV from her room. I dropped it on my foot and broke two toes. She promptly said, "That's what you get." FML
Today, my little brother was feeling like the god damned bratty douchebag he is and hurled a basketball at me. It missed, hit the wall, and rebounded straight into his face. He burst into tears, and I'm now grounded because my parents believed him when he said I threw it at him. FML
Today, I was having lunch and I started throwing crumbs at my friend at the other table. Then I accidentally hit the kid next to him. He got really mad and came over and hit me in the shoulder with a brick. A brick. He just had a brick in his bag. FML
Today, I came home to find my eight-year-old son had basically set fire to the kitchen, after trying to practice some kind of stupid shit he'd seen on TV called "fire bending." FML
Today, I had to take my son to hospital because he had two Lego pieces up his nose. He’s 19 and shoved them up there because he was drunk. FML
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Top comments
WCARlover 35
That kid is brutal! Definitely deserves an old fashioned spanking for that
tdap88 7
I think you may need to read that again
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Comments (202)
Simbaby 23
Your child means buissnesss. Someone needs an old spanking .
jaybone87 8
you kid is a dick
EAVL381forever 10
I think you need to give him a harsher punishment... Kid needs to realize how serious bullying is
sickerthanyou 13
You need to make him swallow Legos and have him poop them out , that'll teach him.
cchuckcloninger 5
Ground him again. Repeat as necessary to stop the power struggle.
taylorloveshk 5
YDI for being the main influence in his life. . . Js
Lazychild 4
If he's grounded why does he still have his Legos?
DanielleinDC 34
Take the Legos away. Hide them somewhere he won't look. Take ALL his toys away and hide them. He can have books--it would probably do him some good to read--but no toys, no computer, no games. And he is grounded for even longer for what he did. And make it clear to him that 1) bullying is not acceptable and 2) getting back at your parents is not acceptable either. You may also want to look for books on what to do if your kid is a bully so you can stop this shit right now.
Derpidoo 7
20000th!
nitrog100 21
The kid learned how to use caltrops. Respect.