Today, the kids I babysit hid from me. While I was looking for them, I stepped on multiple strategically-placed Lego bricks. When I yelped from the pain, the kids jumped out and threw soccer balls in my face. FML
Collection
Fall
Dead leaves, the first cold of the season and an umbrella flipped inside out: fall, the season of grace.
Today, I was babysitting, playing hide and seek. I tried to jump behind the armchair, but it tipped, and I hit my head into the wind chimes, ripped the curtain rod from the wall, and smashed my knee into the wall. I lay on the ground in agonizing pain as the little girl shouted, "I know where you are!" FML
Today, as revenge for being grounded for bullying a kid at school, my eight-year-old son flung a handful of Lego into my path as I walked barefoot into the kitchen. I'm still in pain. FML
Today, I was babysitting 3 toddlers. I wanted to entertain them by making them laugh, but nothing worked. Later on, I started down the stairs, but tripped and tumbled down. I realized I have broken my arm and bruised my knees. I also realized that kids think it's hilarious when you get injured. FML
Today, I stepped out of the kitchen to yell at my kids for running in the house. I had just mopped the floor, and did not want them to fall. I fell while yelling and twisted my ankle. At least they know it's dangerous now. FML
Today, I stepped on not one, not two, but three Legos, all on different occasions throughout the day. FML
Today, I was babysitting. I was sitting on the sofa when I felt that I need to ajust my sitting arangment. After moving, I felt a small toy snap under me. The little boy said it was fine. One hour later he snuck up on me and beat me with an umbrella for breaking his toy. FML
Today, I was walking around in a park when I passed some kids playing soccer. One of them kicked the ball as hard as he could at me. Luckily, I caught the ball, then I drop-kicked it, intending to say, "Go get it." Instead, it bounced off a nearby tree and hit me in the face. FML
Today, I was volunteering at a neighborhood house tutoring a bunch of kids. Everything was going fine until one of them jumped on the table I was at, which broke and hit my knee. I swore in front of all the kids and my volunteer coordinator. FML
Today, I was babysitting, and after the kids fell asleep I started hiding the Easter candy. They woke up when I was half-done, and it didn't take them long to figure out what was going on. They won't stop crying, and every time I go near them, they scream "LIAR!" FML
Today, I babysat my neighbour's spoilt bratty twins. When I told them it was their bed time, they pushed me over. One then started smashing me with a plastic sword, and as I lay helpless on the floor the other one peed on me. I got owned by two five year olds. FML
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Top comments
GrinchFu1 27
I think these kids may have watched Home Alone one too many times...
lautturi 2
Nothing worse than stepping on Legos. Why not strategically place Lego to get them back?
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Comments (86)
NeatNit 33
Comment moderated for rule-breaking.
Wow, they must have horrible parents to turn out that bad. Hope you're getting paid well OP!
iLike2Teabag 27
"Getting paid well" after taking balls to the face. Hmm....
ebdeadaccount 11
Your name and comment match perfectly
natsaysheyyy 16
Spike their food with sleeping medicine and let them wake up bald. Tell their parents they did it to themselves when you were cleaning a mess they made.
Rhian00 17
That's just what kids are like.
smavaddat12 12
#57 What the actual **** hahahaha
lautturi 2
Nothing worse than stepping on Legos. Why not strategically place Lego to get them back?
ladyLALAA 29
Not to take away from OP's moment but I once stood on a full row of staples. The worst part was pulling them out. FYL, OP, get a bag of lollies, eat them in front of them and tease those kids!
kakarot2 11
Why not just wear shoes in the house?
dont_doubt_me 29
In some places, it's considered rude to wear shoes indoors. Also, some people don't like people wearing shoes in their homes because it gets inside dirty.
DropTheDaggerxx 31
I think it's kind of gross to wear shoes indoors. You track dirt from outside all over the place, not to mention germs of whatever you might have stepped on that day. The worst is when people wear shoes on their beds/other furniture!
tswizz 13
And the Lego bricks strike again..
Smokingweenies 3
My God they're learning!
Grootensliven 10
Demon spawn geniouses
mattlw 25
What is a genious?
420Zombie 17
a genious is slang for 'a person who looks up words they don't know on Google'
mattlw 25
I've never heard of a genious. I know what a genius is. ;)
Porrim 9
Ew kids ew Them legos burn like a thousand suns thats for sure.
420Zombie 17
*looks at comment, shakes head in disappointment *
GrinchFu1 27
I think these kids may have watched Home Alone one too many times...
FarFromSocial 9
They were out for blood!
starw0lf 31
Wow, talk about baby sitting budding evil little geniuses!
crackmore278 13
Legos, a child's land mine.
gc327072 31
You can unlock those in Call of Recess : Elementary Warfare 3. VERY effective.
HeyHeyFishFillet 34
Lie and the ground and fake groaning in pain. Once they hopefully come near you, grab them and tape them up. Then proceed to eat their chocolate pudding. By now, you will have shown them who's the boss and they will forever follow your orders. You're welcome OP.
easyprey 8
Just stop them before they worship you as a god, or start building shrines in the backyard to commemorate your power.