Today, as I was walking home from school with my guy friends, my dad pulled up by the sidewalk, offered me a handful of dollar bills and said, "Get in, baby." Only after we drove away and he started laughing did I realize I'll probably never hear the end of this at school. FML
Collection
Halloween
A failed costume, stolen candy and a very real scare: Halloween, the one night when fear is allowed.
Today, my dad said that if I walked home from school, a distance of 8 miles, he would give me $50. Two hours and four massive blisters later, I come home. When I asked for my money, he said "I was kidding." FML
Today, while walking home with my boyfriend, he jokingly slapped my butt. A man as old as my dad drove by, yelled "Wooo, spank that ass! DAMN!" and kept leering at me before finally driving off. FML
Today, as I was walking home from work, my dad drove past, pulled over, rolled down the window and asked, "Are you tired of walking?" To which I replied "Yes!" Just as I reached for the car door, he yelled "RUN A WHILE" and sped off. FML
Today, my dad and I were at the grocery store buying toilet paper. As we walk out I see these two attractive guys that I know. My dad gets that I think they're cute, so he shouts "Hey babe, how's your stomach feeling now? Will this be enough for you?" They walk away laughing. FML
Today, my Dad called me to tell me that he had finally won the lottery and that I no longer had to worry about trying to find a way to pay for school. I was so excited I started crying. He then told me that he won $5 on a scratch off lotto ticket. He bought a sandwich. Funny dad. FML
Today, I went for a run when my shin splints acted up, so I called my dad to have him come pick me up. When I saw his car approaching, I stuck out my thumb like a hitchhiker, as a joke. The car pulled over to give me a ride. It wasn't my dad. FML
Today, I was walking to school. When I was about halfway there, someone put a gun to the back of my head and told me to give him all my money. As I slowly turned around, I saw it was my dad putting a banana to my head. FML
Today, I arrived home after leaving for college in August. My dad figured that the most appropriate way to welcome me back was a loud, piercing fart right when I walked through the front door. FML
Today, my dad was driving me home and was angrily explaining how my boyfriend was a bad influence and that he was hanging out with the wrong crowd. After finally convincing him to give him another chance, we stopped at a traffic light just in time to see my boyfriend being chased by police. FML
Today, I came home and was greeted by my dad telling me that he pawned my guitar for gas money. FML
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Top comments
Moota 9
Cool dad.
jonnyblackless 6
UR DADS THE BEST XD
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Comments (134)
upyourzlolz 11
And this is why OP will be an easy victim.
FailedAtWinning 7
It would be funnier if you called the cops on him
MrKillerTacos 0
Ha!! That's hilarious! Your dads a douche! Ah! It's funny but sad and I'm sorry you have put up with him!
fuckkyeaaaalaura 12
I love your dad , he's hilarious .
ChecoJosuel 6
He really is.
kareltje 17
Hmm... a sense if humor... Maybe the world isn't as sick as I thought. At least for now... Can't figure out whether to vote this FYL or YDI.
drloves69 4
I bet he did it Like A Boss
mrahhhhh 21
I laughed so hard, I am so doing that if I have a daughter.
KennyMcCrmick322 0
And if u have a grandson u can do it lik the old perverted guy on family guy. Just need an extremely old dog....
wegetrz 14
Ha ur dad thinks ur a *****.
KennyMcCrmick322 0
No her dad thinks she's her daughter and is epically funny with his creative ideas
NoNotTheFace 8
A few dollars? You're like the Supersave version of a prostitute. WHO'S YOUR DADDY?
Darklord53 0
*****...