Today, as I was crossing a street, a car hit me and broke two of my ribs. The driver was too busy paying attention to his girlfriend who was giving him a blowjob from the passenger seat. I could see the look of ecstasy on his face as he rammed into me and drove off without noticing. FML
Collection
Halloween
A failed costume, stolen candy and a very real scare: Halloween, the one night when fear is allowed.
Today, my boyfriend crashed his car while I was giving him road head. FML
Today, my husband managed to crash the car because he was too busy looking at an attractive girl with her leggings wedged up her ass crack, and I know he only crashed because he was looking at her, because I was in the car with him when it happened. FML
Today, as I was pulling out of my apartment complex, I was rear-ended. When I got out of my car to see how bad the damage was, I wondered why the other guy wasn't getting out of his. As it turns out, he was busy pleasing himself. I found out when I approached his car. FML
Today, I was in a car accident. After screaming at the woman for running into me, I got in my car and drove off. As I was driving away, I was staring her down when I ended up rear-ending the person in front of me. FML
Today, I was hit by a car in a parking lot. The person sped off; I broke three ribs. My parents screamed at me for not getting the driver's info. FML
Today, someone rear-ended me while I was on my way home. I was extremely upset and I called my boyfriend for comfort and to help inspect the damage. After taking a good look at the car, he said, "Damn, if only you fucked this hard." FML
Today, I was driving to work, following my girlfriend's car. I looked down to change the radio station and felt a large bump. I rear-ended my girlfriend. FML
Today, I saw my crush waving me over from the other end of the parking lot. I ran quickly to greet him, but in my excitement didn't take note of the giant Hummer backing out. I broke two ribs and all my crush was trying to do was warn me of the moving vehicle I was about to run into. FML
Today, my boyfriend knocked into me with his car. I drove myself to the hospital because he couldn't stop laughing long enough to drive. FML
Today, a man on a bike was so preoccupied with making lewd comments about another girl's behind that he drove straight into mine. FML
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Top comments
Jared900DUmpling 30
I just wish the impact had cause his girlfriend to bite down.
TeasinDaNoobs 16
If you remember the kind and color of the car you could report it as a hit and run, even better if you caught the license plate!
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Comments (48)
nanam329 12
Seriously, who tapped on "you deserved it?" OP definitely DID NOT deserve two broken ribs.
darkerdays 5
I hear cha-Ching! Big settlement
Brilliant66star 17
Clearly, coming and going do NOT mix. FYL.
ATPR_4 9
I Don't care how good she is at cleaning the pipes. There is no way you don't realize you just hit someone with your car. Smh
shinikageWolf 15
On the bright side you could sue his ass and make him pay for your tuition.
BodyElectric 18
You a fan of Stephen King? Because that would have been a great time to cast a Gypsy curse on him. "...Thinner..."
pharmalady 10
I was looking for this. :)
bickdig69 8
D a m n d r u g g i e s
LAURA_EL_JUICE 6
OMG, what was the officers reaction when you told them how it happened?
Rsflett 5
Ever see the movie (or read the book) "Thinner"?
Nissi 17
Wait, wait, wait... This couldn't possibly have happened in Canada. D:<