Today, an extremely attractive woman from FedEx came to deliver my new phone. I was wearing athletic shorts and had an erection. She looked down and laughed. FML
Collection
Fall
Dead leaves, the first cold of the season and an umbrella flipped inside out: fall, the season of grace.
Today, I had just finished riding my bike when I ran into the girl I am secretly in love with. While I walked over to her I got an erection through my spandex biking shorts. FML
Today, while making deliveries, a lady answered the door stark naked and invited me in. I'm a young single guy so I went for it, but her husband was also there, ready to go with an enormous boner, so I ran to my van and went back to the depot. They reported me for bad customer service. FML
Today, my girlfriend text me and told me to do something sexy because she was going to FaceTime me. I eagerly dropped my pants and started stroking it to get ready for her. As soon as I opened her call, she was standing with my wife. I literally got caught with my dick in my hand. FML
Today, my girlfriend came over to my house. Hoping to get a little action, I started to make out with her. Unfortunately I was wearing basketball shorts so when I got an erection, all she did was bat it back forth like a cat toy. FML
Today, at the gym, a very attractive lady was working out in front of me, wearing tiny shorts that left zero to the imagination. I kept trying to avert my gaze, until her extremely buff boyfriend came over and threatened me. My crime? I wasn’t checking out his girl enough. FML
Today, I went to the physician to check my rear because it was hurting. My usual doctor wasn't available, so he was replaced by a gorgeous woman with big cleavage. when she asked me to pull down my pants, she saw that I had a huge hard on. FML
Today, I was in my room, in my briefs and texting my girlfriend. Suddenly, I got a massive erection and I decided to take a picture to send her. As soon as my camera phone clicked, my mom walked in. You can see my mom in the picture screaming at me. FML
Today, I was on a stationary bike at the gym. I got into a conversation with a very attractive female gym-friend. I felt something cool "down below". I looked down and saw one of my testicles had sneaked out of a hole in my shorts, I quickly looked up only to see her staring at the same thing. FML
Today, I got a completely random boner at a coffee shop, five seconds before two attractive women asked me to stand up and take their picture. FML
Today, I was at the laundromat, when an attractive girl set up at the machine next to mine. She looked me up and down, then noticed the skid-marks on my underwear. FML
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Top comments
Harry_Poochi 0
You should have shown her your package.
pinky0090 0
Should have asked for her number
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Comments (99)
RainNIU 0
the possibilities themselves are giving me a boner. thx!
Gothere 0
This is an awesome site you can post your secrets or fears, all right here!: http://trynot2click-this.yolasite.com/
Andyangels27 0
wow sound like a **** to me minus the laughing and the small penis
iAquament 0
YDI for not covering it up and/or for having a ridiculously small/big penis and/or for not whipping it out unless you're married/dating. All this combined, I voted FYL.
suaveneanderthal 0
well she probably laughed cause you had a damn boner but you probably thought she was laughing cause you thought your penis was small which means it probably is, so yeah FYL
flinkpamingo 0
Well THAT was embarassing!
aback 5
Should have dropped a 2-litre pop bottle down there.
blackwidowtaco 31
Liter*
Jakester 0
you could have pulled a Quagmire by running in to your house, take off your clothes, and run to her and say "I got a package for YOU!!!"
Munkee 6
HAHA, that was exactly what I was thinking when I read this FML. xD
MimaaRoar 0
Giggity! :P
Escapist28 0
This is possibly the only clever first post I've seen on FML, and no one who replied to it acknowledged that! Oh well. I was amused, mercyFML
tenniskettle 0
ooh im sorry but YDI, you sound like you should be old enough not to get an erection just because a pretty lady comes to the door.