Today, a woman pushed a stroller in front of my car. Thinking I'd hit someone, I jumped out. Turns out it was a doll. The "woman" was a 14-year-old girl, claiming, "I did it for the Vine!" FML
Collection
Fall
Dead leaves, the first cold of the season and an umbrella flipped inside out: fall, the season of grace.
Today, I saw a lady with a stroller in the park. She stopped at the water fountain and got a drink, then left without her baby. I ran to the stroller and started rolling it after her. Two grown men attacked me, accusing me of trying to steal said baby. Turns out it was a baby doll. FML
Today, my car window got smashed, because someone somehow confused the doll my daughter always leaves strapped into a carseat for an actual kid. It's a cabbage patch kid. FML
Today, I was driving when a woman started crossing the street against the light at the upcoming intersection, so I slammed on the brakes and stopped short of hitting her. That's when she intentionally jumped onto my car and started screaming that I had "mowed her down". The cops believed her. FML
Today, my 6 year-old daughter got mad at me for not buying her yet another expensive doll. I had to pull her away, and she started screaming for help. The next thing I know, another shopper puts me in a chokehold and calls for security, all while my daughter smirks. FML
Today, an old lady fell in the street, and I rushed to help her. As I tried to help her to her feet, she started screaming, "She pushed me! She pushed me!" I froze up in shock, and ended up being chased by some guy who thought I'd attacked her. FML
Today, I saw a little old lady trying to cross the street. I went over and tried to help her. Turned out she was actually just a really short young woman. As soon as I took her arm, she screamed in front of everyone and accused me of trying to molest her. FML
Today, I punched an older woman in the face. I only hit her after she grabbed my 4-year-old daughter and told her to, "stop dancing like a whore!" My daughter was so terrified, she peed her pants. FML
Today, my child was refusing to leave the playground. I had to pry her, screaming and crying, from the monkey bars. I then realized I had been assaulting someone else's kid. FML
Today, I was strolling past an old women when from behind me she called, "Can you help me get the rest of the groceries out of the car?" I approached the car, and helped her unload bags. She began hitting me, screaming, "SOMEONE IS STEALING MY THINGS". She was actually asking her son in the car. FML
Today, I saw a pregnant woman fall off her moped. As I helped her back up, I asked if her baby was okay. I was then blindsided by her brick of a purse while she screeched, "I'm not pregnant!" FML
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Top comments
crissalove 22
Wow. That's what this generation has come to.
ImmaEatYouXx 10
Well let's hope she doesn't become a teen mother...
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Comments (134)
DovakinPrincess 5
what is the vine??
CinderBrick 13
It's a social network where people post videos to gain internetz
TheAbstract 15
"to gain internetz." That's wonderful.
jadevv 12
The internetz?
kirrra 11
can someone explain why #12 gets voted down for aaking the same thing #9 asked while #9 gets voted up...? everyone giving out about technology and social media etc and then moaning when someone isnt actually familiar with some of it.
Indianboy9321 25
That's really ****** up. A 14 year old girl transformed into a social monster by an app...
Enslaved 38
Great! Get a copy of the video and you have evidence!
graceinsheepwear 34
for what purpose?
junkman6 22
#95 that this generation revels in its stupidity. Now for you little teenies out there notice what I said. I'm not saying this generation is any dumber than the last. This generation is just way too proud of its morons.
xivoricbutterfly 25
Push her in front of a car and say "I did it for the vine" Should be fine.
PipingMouse 14
It even rhymed.
Lacist 19
Sorry can someone explain what OP means by jumping out?
nana_star 27
Jumping out of the car
cyndustry 3
I'm 31 and love the new generation, the vine is the ****!! and how else am I meant to find an 18yo dumb enough to do me ?
nesto209 7
everybody trying to do it for The Vine (>_
driinkbleach 18
I guess Im not "hip" to the new stuff these days, what the heck is "The Vine?" I guess
hokie16 13
Vines are like 6-8 second videos usually making fun of something most people can relate to, making a stupid joke or quick sketch, or doing smoothing stupid to get a huge reaction out of someone. Idk about other social media, but they're all over fb so if you have a fb you've probably seen one and not even known it.
hokie16 13
*something
Azaleeea 20
OMG what's happening to the world and 14 years old girls :S
xerbrus 14
14 year old have always been ****** in the head because they think they're big when they hit high school but their brains are still 10 whole years from developing fully. They still have very little impulse control and next to no judgement skills they cannot assess a situation in a rational way.
Aligator67 12
Not every 14 year old is like that! Some in my school wear tons of make up and think they're better than everyone, but then there's that other half that dresses as they choose and are against those who make vines like this, along with many many other things. They're called the weirdos or something stupid like that, but they do exist. I know they do. Not everyone is this generation is bad.
letsgooo_fml 23
I feel like that should be illegal in some way.
knoxxx 22
It is, it's called reckless endangerment.