Today, a friend of mine sent me a message saying, "Man, I am so sorry but we were both really drunk and I swear it didn't mean anything." FML
Collection
Halloween
A failed costume, stolen candy and a very real scare: Halloween, the one night when fear is allowed.
Today, my best friend got drunk and told me he's only friends with me because no one else will be friends with him. He then went on to tell me that he wasn't actually that drunk. FML
Today, I was texting my boyfriend about yesterday, where he told me how much he loved me, and he wishes we lived closer. I asked him if he really meant it. Turns out he was drunk, and had no idea what he was talking about. FML
Today, after drunk texting a girl the night before, I sent her a message saying I was sorry for everything I said. All she could say back? "Those were some of the most normal drunk texts I have ever read. I'd hate to see how boring you'd be sober." FML
Today, a drunk dude walked up to me and said, "You're ugly as fuck." His sober friend quickly apologized and explained that he was wasted, before looking me up and down and adding, "Well, not completely, I guess." FML
Today, I was holding my drunken friend's hair while she threw up in the toilet at a party. She said, crying, "Y'don't have to do this..." I told her that that's what friends are for. She replied, "Yeah, but I did sleep with your boyfriend..." FML
Today, it was my friend's 18th birthday. She had invited us out drinking. I've never had alcohol before and was very excited. I got a call explaining that she had invited one too many and asked me not to come. People bragging on Facebook about what a great time they were having didn't help either. FML
Today, slightly drunk from a head-frazzle of a night out from hell, I sent a text meant for my friend recounting the terrible date I'd just been on… to the date himself. He replied with, "I know, right?" FML
Today, my dad posted on Facebook, apologizing to anyone he'd texted the night before. He said he'd gotten wasted and didn't mean anything he said. So much for that first ever "I'm proud of you" then. FML
Today, I got a text message. It said, "I'm so drunk. What you up to, girl?" It was my dad. FML
Today, my best friend texted me and told me she broke up with her boyfriend. Trying to be supportive, I sent a long message about how he never deserved her and that I was there for her if she needed someone to vent to. She replied, "Are you high?" FML
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Top comments
jonr93 0
That....... is an issue.
lettertjes 0
That sucks, but I love how you phrased it.
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Comments (109)
ohSNAPyall 27
At least he told you.. you'd rather know than be cuckolded, right? But over text? That's taking it pretty lightly. I don't understand how this happens. Even when I'm drunk, I know who my friends' boyfriends and husbands are and wouldn't hit on them, much less try to sleep with them. What a terrible friend.
redBuddhist 5
what are you meaning? sorry, but i think i can't get it...
youthink_fml 0
How is this an FML? It says nothing.
thoughtcrimeno1 0
it implies an infidlity. if that is nothing then your standards must be abysmally low...
pandorasnymph 0
ydi for getting drunk
alaroo101 0
I have been in the same boat (except I didn't know the guy). Alcohol just does not agree with anything.
jellyfishdelight 0
A drunk man's words are a sober man's truth
maph3rs 0
nice comment. true also!!
Kockdiesel 0
is your ass a little sore?
justanotherhuman 21
Dear OP, Getting drunk doesn't make people say and/or do stupid things, it reveals the depth of their character and integrity. Identify all factors and participants, then terminate respective relationships. FYL.
TranquilMarzipan 0
Totally agree.
lolque 0
Lol good game.
purple91 8
I think OP should clear up whether it was his gf and his friend who hooked up or himself and his friend. Like most previous comments, I'm hoping for the latter haha.