Noname
United States
Today, a creepy man on the subway said he liked my eyeballs. It was the best compliment I've received in months. FML
Collection
Halloween
A failed costume, stolen candy and a very real scare: Halloween, the one night when fear is allowed.
Same thing different taste
Anonymous
San Diego, United States
Today, I volunteered at a soup kitchen. During the rounds, a grisly but nice young fellow told me that I had beautiful eyes. I was quite touched; that is until he leaned in and added, "Can I have them for my collection?" FML
Anonymous
Los Angeles, United States
Today, a man on the subway serenaded me. That's not the issue. He was cross-eyed, making it hard for me not to laugh in his face. FML
fmylifebad
United States
Today, I was on the subway and saw this cute guy eyeing me. I crossed my legs, tossed back my hair, and raised my eyebrows slightly. As he came up to me, my heart started racing until he finally started flirting... with the girl next to me. FML
Anonymous
Bicester, United Kingdom
Today, I made eye contact with a cute guy from across a packed train. He then yelled out, in front of everyone, "You've got foam on your nose!" FML
anonmys
United States
Today, I was riding the train and saw a cute guy licking his lips at me. Flattered, I gave him my number when the train stopped. He looked at me and said, "Don't flatter yourself. You have mustard on your face." FML
belladonna
United States
Today, I took the subway. The man sitting across from me would not stop staring at my breasts, so when the train came to my stop, I said, "Nothing to see now, asshole." Then I noticed his white walking stick as he got up to get off. He was blind. FML
Anonymous
New York, United States
I'm a creep
Today, I realized my reflection in the subway window wasn’t just my reflection - it was an actual person sitting outside the train, making the same face as me. We both jumped when we locked eyes. FML
ilovecowboys
New Zealand
Today, on the train to work, the train guard was hot and I became stupidly nervous. I'm very shy and was trying to avoid eye-contact. He said 'THANK YOU', in a pissed off tone of voice and glared at me. I had absent-mindedly been staring in the direction of his prosthetic arm the entire time. FML
creepyguy
Australia
Today, I noticed a girl looking at me on the train. Playing it cool, I decided to give her a smile and see what would happen. It came out as a creepy, seedy grin, prompting her to call security. FML
ruvru
United States
Today, while lying next to me, my boyfriend smiled and told me, "I really like your eyes. They're pretty." He paused and then finished with, "They really help your face." FML
Top comments
Jimboom 12
Probably because he either wanted to lick them or eat them
N07H666 0
that's one creative pickup line!!! I gotta remember that one
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Comments (51)
fml147 0
"wanted to eat or lick them" lol. ahhaha. thats too funny. but thats creepy.
tyson_457 0
at least he didnt say that u had a pretty mouth.
holynemesis1208 3
he thought they looked tasty.
starstrukk 0
# 11 bahahahahahahhahha but seriously? i would be sooo creeped out
skylitxrock 0
hahahahah i've said that before. i don't understand why it's so creepy. but congratulations on your pretty/tastey eyeballs!
fakelaw 0
I've sadly gotten this comment before--from a guy that was later on American Idol. Apparently it's a better comment than people realize.
BalenciagaBetch9 0
thats b/c hes imagining what they would taste like in a stew.
marris 0
Run away, he might want to add them to his collection
countrygurl 0
OMGOMGOMG!!!!! that's amazing! lol
Zic_fml 7
Now you can be confident that you have nice eyeballs. When you look at people, they will say "X, you have nice eyeballs", and you will reply with "thankyou". What an ideal life you have!