Today, I was cleaning out my bedside table when I came across some condoms I bought on my 18th birthday, to use the first time I had sex. They expired five years ago. I'm still waiting for my first time. FML
Collection
Halloween
A failed costume, stolen candy and a very real scare: Halloween, the one night when fear is allowed.
Today, my friends were all talking about the first time they bought condoms. I can still remember the first time I bought them; in fact they are unopened and expired in my bedside table. FML
Today, the condoms I bought a few years ago as a celebration of dumping my girlfriend due to a lack of sex, have expired. Every last one of them. FML
Today, I was cleaning out from underneath my bed and found a used condom. I've never had sex in my own room. FML
Today, I was cleaning out my room and picked up my bed and found a condom. I'm 15 and still a virgin. FML
Today, I had to throw away twenty condoms that were all expired, because that's how active my sex life is. FML
Today, I found a used condom in my bed. I haven't had sex in months and now I'm terrified. FML
Today, I haven't had sex for so long that my condoms have gone off. FML
Today, I was cleaning my older brother's room in my mom's house after he had just moved out with his girlfriend. I guess I was multitasking a little too much and not paying too much attention to what I was doing and I realized 15 seconds later, I was holding a used condom in my right hand. FML
Today, I realized I bought 30 condoms last year. I now have 29. FML
Today, I whacked off with a condom on and left it in the living room waste basket so it looked like I finally had sex with someone. FML
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Top comments
imajinethat 0
Well, the good news is, you just got ****** by life. :) Congrats.
Animati0n 0
So? It's not a bad thing.
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Comments (257)
Damone 0
buy new ones, just in case
RefinedMotion 0
to...like half these comments. a WOMAN posted this. pay attention to what you read before you respond and sound dumb. and dont worry, you'll do it sometime and it'll be great. caz sex just is. but you dont need to rush or worry about it. what happens, happens.
hilhal 0
so?
hootersgirl 0
at least you don't have aids from some ***** yet :D
Skittles_Cat_09 0
u want us to make funn of yu?
hobosaresexy 0
apparently pretty hard. but really. this person is an ancient virgin.
Blacksteel56 3
I feel quite sorry for you... but you should of come to High Wycombe a girl can't seem to go through 16 years of age without having it in every area in the town...ask my ex g/f lmao!
needsagf14 12
here's an idea- get married THEN do it
Funky_Daniel 0
Have u seen the movie the 40 year old virgin.
babyqeelove 0
i dont understand if this is a fml? your waiting for marriage on your first time. some of us cant do that. congrats :)