Today, I learnt that the people I work with dislike me so much that they have a competition to see who can accidentally hurt me the most. How did I find out? A chef poured boiling water over my hands, and another shouted "50 POINTS!" FML
Collection
Halloween
A failed costume, stolen candy and a very real scare: Halloween, the one night when fear is allowed.
Today, while cooking, I managed to burn my finger. I quickly turned the tap on and ran my finger under cold water, but apparently someone had just used the hot tap, because boiling water flooded out onto my nicely scalded finger. FML
Today, after telling my best friend an idiot could make Kraft Dinner, I spilled boiling water all over my hands and forearms while attempting to strain the noodles. FML
Today, I tried to break up a fight between two of my coworkers. They decided to show their gratitude by smashing me in the face with a thick ceramic dish. FML
Today, I got burned, all because the toaster scared me while I was holding a pot of boiling water. FML
Today, I thought it would be funny to put a few extra spoonfuls of sugar in my co-worker's coffee. He thought it would be funny to throw the boiling hot coffee over my crotch. FML
Today, my kitchen is trying to kill me. So far, I've hit my head three times on cupboards that opened themselves, cut open my hand on the microwave door when it slammed shut, and burned my cheek with the "heat-proof" oven mitt when I pushed the hair off my face. FML
Today, I was fired from my job because I would "scare" the customers. Two days ago, a coworker spilled fry oil onto the grill, causing flames to singe my eyebrows and the front of my hair off. FML
Today, while grabbing a husk of corn out of the boiling hot pot, I splashed hot water on my neck, dropped the corn on my injured toe, and cut myself on the counters, all while my family laughed at my pain. FML
Today, I made a cup of tea at work. Whilst talking to a workmate, I took a sip of the tea, which I had forgotten was boiling hot, and laughed at the same time, causing it to come out of my nose. I have blistered my whole mouth and even burnt my nostrils. FML
Today, at work teaching a cooking class, one of the kids asked if they could use a knife to help me chop vegetables. I said no, because it was very sharp and only staff members are allowed to use them. Just as I said that, the knife sliced through the tip of my thumb. FML
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Top comments
Pommy_fml 0
don't be a baby. cut his junk and yell 200 points!
slowlybreakingme 14
wow. that's ****** man!
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Comments (132)
iplaymw2 0
/wow lol 90
jennbugg 0
learnt?
jacqueline101 0
Tomorrow at work get boiling water too in a pot and "acidentaly" make the boiling water hit his face then yell 'and 200 points for the win!' :P
RollFizzlebeef 0
When are they going to get around to adding "This is fake!" and "Sounds plausible" buttons? They're really long overdue...
MrFlintstone 5
kick his " butt "
hippy_lady 4
wow thats pretty mean. get another job
sexypants5266 6
they must have a reason for doing that...r u an annoying person?
littlenova13 2
um even if they are annoying, there ARE laws against causing bodily injuries to other people. and even if they say its an accident, they are still liable for it and also, just because someone is annoying does NOT give anyone the right to dump boiling water on them. basic human rights
sexypants5266 6
@158 it's the other way around...u say learnt in the US and learned in the UK...LOOK IT UP freak
hedgehogs 0
Time to start keeping track of all your medical records and talk to an attorney to see what can be done to stop this and bring these idiots to their senses (quite a lot IMO). Annoying or not -- and you probably are -- they can't be getting away with this.
ClouDn9n 0
Doesn't sound like an accident to me. Rather, sounds like an innocent game of 'Basketboil'. Don't worry, you'll probably beat them at 'Soccer' Punch.