Today, my girlfriend thought it would be a good idea to go down on me with chewing gum in her mouth. I spent the next hour and a half getting Orbit out of my pubes. FML
Collection
Fall
Dead leaves, the first cold of the season and an umbrella flipped inside out: fall, the season of grace.
Today, I was laying in bed making out with a girl. After trying to figure out for a while why she was spending so much time on my neck it finally hit me. She was frantically and secretly trying to remove the gum she got stuck in my hair. She failed. FML
Today, to show that he really wanted me to shave myself, my boyfriend pretended to go down on me, but instead of following through, he stuck a wad of gum in my pubic hair and got back up. FML
Today, I was about to make out with my boyfriend, so I quickly swallowed my gum. Moments later, I started choking on the gum, and ended up spitting it out into his face. FML
Today, I was getting intimate with my girlfriend for the first time. In an attempt to be romantic, I tried taking her panties off with my teeth. I got a mouthful of pubes stuck in my braces. FML
Today, I went down on my girlfriend for the first time. Let's just say pubes and toilet paper residue were the least of my problems. FML
Today, I decided to treat my girlfriend by eating her out. After a while I thought she was going to cum, but instead she farted in my mouth. FML
Today, I was masturbating while chewing gum. Halfway into the session, the gum flew down my throat, causing me to violently choke. My mom had to rush in and help me while I still had my pants around my ankles. FML
Today, instead of pushing me away or simply stopping for a minute, my girlfriend kept kissing me as she was trying to get phlegm out of her throat. The slimy goo ended up in the back of my mouth. I can still taste it. FML
Today, I was in the cinema making out with my girlfriend. I asked her if she could stop trying to pass me her gum because it was kinda gross. She replied, "It's not gum, I just have bronchitis." FML
Today, while in the hot tub with my friends, my gum fell out of my mouth and I had no idea where it went. Later that night I realized it had fallen down my swimsuit and had become adhered to my pubic hairs which then stuck to my underwear. FML
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Top comments
pdp_fml 21
Why not try shaving down there? Girls like it because they don't have to smell your nasty sweat.
H_Brazell09 0
Maybe this is a sign to start shaving.
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Comments (231)
lefty619 6
Why wouldn't you just shave them? Brings it down to about 10 minutes. Common sense
stinkFist232 3
Should probably work on the manscaping there, chief.
Chris9154 6
Ydi. Trim that shat!
charlielara 4
interesting take on a peppermint patty
snafubar 0
Did you have that "Clean" feeling.
Davick 0
o-O I would ask her when did you that was a good idea
cheesendouche 1
you deserved it, only cavemen and ferrels have pubes these days. have some respect for yourself and your partner and shave that shit off!! eww. also wtf was ur girlfriend thinking o.0 crushed ice, bubbly wine, or peppermint icecream maybe but gum??!!! wtf u both need to get some sex ed!
Malicteal 21
That's why you need to do a little Manscaping. That, and it makes it look bigger.
ryanreed4021 5
put her in a diaper. that did it for me.
HeartsCry 0
Shave the thing man