Today, my car got keyed because I was parked in a handicapped parking spot. I'm handicapped. FML
Collection
Halloween
A failed costume, stolen candy and a very real scare: Halloween, the one night when fear is allowed.
Today, someone tried to break into my car. They tried to do so by jamming a key into my lock, only for the key to break. I guess the key cut their hand, because I had the pleasure of finding the person's blood all over my passenger door. FML
Today, my car broke down in the middle of nowhere. I walked about 3 miles to the nearest house to call a tow truck. When I got back to where I left my car, it was gone. FML
Today, I witnessed a car accident. Being an experienced paramedic, I rushed to the scene to see if anyone needed help. As I assessed the people involved, one of them pickpocketed me. FML
Today, I asked a traffic cop if it was okay to park my car briefly in a 'Monday to Friday only' parking spot, since it's Saturday. She politely replied I could. I came back less than ten minutes later, only to find a parking ticket stuck to my windshield. FML
Today, my car was stolen. I got it back later without the engine, any of the wheels or my brand new radio and speakers. They even took my car mats. FML
Today, my boss entrusted me with his car to run an errand, as I usually take the bus. I managed to get there and back safely before someone slammed into me while I was re-entering the lot, causing major damage. It was his wife, who thought I was a car thief. FML
Today, while walking down the street, a truck hit a puddle and splashed me with water. After I cursed and flipped him off, he put his truck in reverse and splashed me again. FML
Today, I was driving when I saw someone pulled over on the side of the road. Wanting to help, I pulled over. In so doing, I ran over something that popped my tire. The guy had just pulled over to pee. FML
Today, my car broke down. My colleague came to get me and then, later, my husband picked me up from work. We went to collect my abandoned car, but it was gone. It took 10 minutes of me panicking and thinking it had been stolen before he crumpled in laughter and told me he'd already collected it. FML
Today, anticipating another stressful day of work, I left my house with a cluster of thoughts in my mind. It was only when I heard my front door lock behind me, my hand still resting on the handle, that I realised I had forgotten my house keys. FML
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Top comments
Freeze_fml 17
How do you know that was the reason?
yumsugarr 8
Didn't you have that handicapped slip out?
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Comments (139)
dragon0000 7
Maybe they thought you weren't good enough to be handicap (sorry epic fail)
pinkspaceboundro 0
Your comment was an epic fail!
MizzErikaHart 8
You say they keyed your car because you're handicapped? Doubt it. I'm sure they just keyed your car cuz it was a car to key.
Keyman1212 14
Good enough to be handicapped? I don't think anyone would be "good enough". Maybe unfortunate enough? Handicapped people are some of the strongest people I know, mentally. Unless you're handicapped because you're obese. Then, just go **** yourself.
gojira666 7
Guessin OP failed to mention that they forgot to hang the handicapped parking pass.....
EvilPotato 15
1 what is considered as "good enough" for handicapped people.
awesomemarcus 0
that make no sence
KennyMcCrmick322 0
What the **** are you trying to say, handicap people aren't "goo enough".
KennyMcCrmick322 0
Wait holy crap I miss rea that comment.... That made no ******* sense at all
lolmaster7654321 4
Lol fyi ugly aint a handicap! ( i dont mean this just really wanted to say it):P
rottentomatoes 7
Maybe OP didn't have one of those stickers that prove the car belongs to a handicapped person. Not sure
JMWisc 0
Being fat and being handicapped are different.
Keyman1212 14
112- In the United States, being overweight can classify you as disabled, and you can receive a handicapped parking permit. ****** up you ask? Why yes, yes it is!
militarybrat 21
It is. My mother had to wait until she had two open heart surgeries to get just a temp. one.
gochantizzlego 2
That's not cool...>=[ Maybe someone thought is was someone else!
omfgfmlife 0
maybe they keyed it to key it. i doubt it had anything to do with your choice of parking. maybe you arent a very likeable person :o. just a theory *and here come the thumb downs ._.*
rexgar2000 10
or maybe someone got him/her back for something.
ILoveMyXbox 0
Haha maybe the cop didn't get their donuts and coffee
lexex1 4
You should stick to playing xbox.
marpay 11
I highly doubt that a police officer would vandalize someones car.
ArentICute 0
Seems like you didnt get your donuts and coffee either.
tyceabbott101 4
Lol
yumsugarr 8
Didn't you have that handicapped slip out?
zombicidal 11
often people have it on their license plate and the person probably didn't look there and since he didn't see the parking pass thing on the mirror he did something stupid
rayzer_fml 0
Yeah people tend to be reeeeaalllyyy stupid now adays and tend to act out on anger and aggression... It's pretty sad.
gazzdogs 5
Some people are just pricks.
Freeze_fml 17
How do you know that was the reason?
n0pants3ver 0
exactly. how do you know that is the reason?
gazzdogs 5
Why did you feel the need to repeat exactly what he/her just said?
alstbv12 13
Yeah 10! Why DID you feel the need to repeat exactly what he/she just said?
alstbv12 13
Oh damn. 19 you just had to go and trick me with your "he/her" tomfoolery.
fallsupstairs 6
I wish 10 was showing a little less boob in that picture... *shudder*
countryboy910 0
I wish 42 wouldn't show her disgusting belly button ring.
DocBastard 40
I wish people would stop commenting on people's profile pictures, hop off of Freeze's comment, and stop acting like childish idiots.
winnn_fml 0
wish 64 didn't show how anime freak he was
13FTW 9
After reading these comments, I completely forgot what the FML was about...
gazzdogs 5
DAMN IT! he/her? What the hell is wrong with me. (my previous comment)
kittykat1501 31
33, I see what you did there
shooterbuddy 8
That's just a bitch.
amanda_smith54 4
How do you know that's why they keyed you?
ImaginaryFoe 1
Right. It could be that they don't like you because you complained when they threw you out of the lift. WTF is wrong with people lately? I don't think a handicapped person deserves extra special treatment but damn, keying a car over a parking spot? Only pricks who park their Jags sideways deserve that!
goaliemkl123 8
That's what I'm thinking. Maybe. Just maybe. They don't like handicaps and keyed it Bc they don't like handicaps
Jamicianprince 1
Sorry man but keep your. Chin up
NomOnShroomz 14
...assuming you're not paralyzed
ollie179 21
How do people do that? I JUST ASSUME THE OWNER OF THIS CAR ISNT HANDICAPPED SO ILL KEY IT!