Today, I held my bag of burger and fries out the window while driving, to preserve that new car smell. Not only did I hit a pothole and lose my lunch, I got pulled over by a cop who suspected I was either littering or tossing drugs when I saw him. FML
Collection
Halloween
A failed costume, stolen candy and a very real scare: Halloween, the one night when fear is allowed.
Today, I got pulled over by a cop car. As I was fumbling for my license and registration, I handed the officer a half-empty bag of Doritos I’d forgotten was in my glove box. He thought I was trying to bribe him. FML
Today, I got pulled over for a broken taillight. When I rolled down the window, the cop asked me if I was smoking crack. When I told him I didn't do drugs, he didn't believe me since he could detect a foul odor coming from my car. I'd just passed gas big time. FML
Today, I made the decision to quit smoking while I was driving in my car. So I took my pack, crushed it and threw it out the window. I felt triumphant about this change I was making in my life, until the cop I didn't know was behind me gave me a ticket for littering. FML
Today, a cop car was tailing me. I was scared, and trying to avoid any tickets, I drove straight through a huge pothole rather than swerving to avoid it. The cop pulled me over and insisted I was intoxicated, because, "anybody in their right mind would've dodged that pothole." FML
Today, I drove a different work vehicle, one with the cupholder right behind the gear lever. After multiple accidental attempts at changing gears with my Coke bottle, I threw it out the window in a temper. I then got busted for littering. FML
Today, I was massively hungover and driving home. I had a strong suspicion that I was gonna ralph so I was smart and pulled over. I emptied the contents of my stomach into a shopping bag and was proud I didn't make a mess all over the car. Seconds later, the bottom of the bag gave out. FML
Today, I was pulled over for distracted driving. I'd been eating a donut. Let's just say the officer didn't appreciate being offered one. FML
Today, I was eating whilst driving. I tried to stop sauce from spilling on the console and instead smashed into a parked car. FML
Today, I parked next to a police officer's car in a bad part of town. When I got out, I saw a bag of pot on the ground between the cop's car and mine. When I pointed it out to him, he insisted it was mine and interrogated me to the point of tears. FML
Today, I was smoking while driving. A cop pulled me over and asked if I knew what I did wrong. I thought he could smell the tobacco, so I decided to just admit it. As it turns out, I was going well over the speed limit. FML
Feel like sharing it with the other FML users?
Thanks, your FML was submitted, and will appear in the moderation queue soon!
Top comments
revan546 24
Why didn't you just open all the windows? It wouldn't smell that bad..
justtheotherguy 12
well at least your car is still smelling new & that's what matters
Add a comment · Reply to
You must be logged in to be able to post comments!
Comments (161)
mrtonyanderson 20
Idiot
metalhead88 9
Your a dumbass
Taurus_ChicKa 37
This is why women get a bad reputation as drivers. OP, seriously, if you were that worried about your new car smelling, either don't get takeout or don't buy a new car. It's that simple. YDI
TheHeavyOne 15
You are a special kind of idiot.
YellowKettleBell 31
one word---febreeze
shinikageWolf 15
Open windows and air fresheners. They have New Car scents....
sarahadlina 14
How about eating outside the car?
julianterror 3
You are literally the dumbest ************ ever
RayvenWhite 12
I just want you to know that you are a dumbass, congratulations.
ZoeyBaby 3
Wow you're snoody. Then just dont buy food if your car is so important