Today, a cop car was tailing me. I was scared, and trying to avoid any tickets, I drove straight through a huge pothole rather than swerving to avoid it. The cop pulled me over and insisted I was intoxicated, because, "anybody in their right mind would've dodged that pothole." FML
Collection
Wild Nights Out
Last call, bad decisions and 3 a.m. texts you'll regret until noon. Cheers.
Today, I was driving home from work when I was pulled over by a cop. She asked why I was being pulled over and figuring she knew I said, "For swerving because of my alcohol problem." I had a broken tail light. FML
Today, I was driving home. I desperately needed the bathroom, so I was speeding a little bit. A cop pulled me over and gave me hell. He said he'd heard my story a hundred times and didn't believe me. I couldn't hold it and ended up marinating in my own piss while he ran my plates. FML
Today, I crashed into a pole on purpose as a cop pulled me over for speeding. I figured the officer would feel bad for me and that the cost of fixing my car would be less than a ticket. He gave me one anyway. FML
Today, I was driving on the freeway when I saw a car in front of me swerving across 3 lanes of traffic. Thinking he might be drunk, I dialed 911 on my phone, but I dropped it. I fished under my seat to get it, swerving, and got pulled over by highway patrol and given a field sobriety test. FML
Today, while I was driving, a police officer jumped out from the sidewalk and into my lane. I slammed on the brakes so I wouldn't hit him. He then gave me a ticket for "obstructing traffic." FML
Today, a policeman pulled me over and proceeded to flirt with me. After I had rejected him, he gave me a ticket for "not paying attention to the road". FML
Today, I was pulled over for a DWI. The police officer was drunk. FML
Today, while driving home I had to pee really bad, so I speeded up to get home quicker. I got pulled over for speeding and peed my pants. The cop, assuming I was drunk, made me take a sobriety test. I had to walk a straight line with piss all over my pants at 2:00 in the afternoon. FML
Today, I held my bag of burger and fries out the window while driving, to preserve that new car smell. Not only did I hit a pothole and lose my lunch, I got pulled over by a cop who suspected I was either littering or tossing drugs when I saw him. FML
Today, I was driving a little over the speed limit, when I saw a cop car waiting to join the road ahead of me. I quickly hit the brakes so they wouldn't have a payday with me. I hit the brakes too hard, lost control and almost ended up on someone's lawn. FML
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Top comments
MrConcise 35
Just act like a normal person when cops are tailing you, you'll look less suspicious. You think they don't know you're going five miles under the speed limit because they're behind you?
devildog562 33
Pot hole troll at your service .
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Comments (61)
devildog562 33
Pot hole troll at your service .
MrConcise 35
Just act like a normal person when cops are tailing you, you'll look less suspicious. You think they don't know you're going five miles under the speed limit because they're behind you?
garrett_8614 14
I personally find it extremely annoying when cops tail you. I hate when anyone tails me, but it's like they're just trying to get me to make a mistake so they can pull me over.
lnheritance 19
To make OP feel better, I got my first ticket today for going 13 over on my way to classes (rushing).
enddmd 27
Couldn't you pull over and hit your hazards and let him pass you? That's what I do if I'm nervous with a cop behind me.
clrichmond2009 24
2, I actually saw a guy get pulled over for that last week. He was driving ten under in the passing lane because there was a cop behind him. The officer finally got fed up with his slow speed while people consistently passed them in the right lane and flipped his lights on. The cop ended up busting the guy with a bunch of drugs too.
horneyhic 15
Doing 10 under is enough to raise suspicions any way but doing in the passing lane is just dumb
devildog562 33
#22 What the hell did you do, pull over while the cop questioned and searched the vehicle ? Ride along maybe ?
sturschaedel 27
Why does everyone seem to think any cop car driving behind them is automatically "tailing" them? Please correct me if this is really a synonym (not my first language), but I'm under the impression that tailing is more in the sense of purposely following a specific person rather than coincidentally driving behind the same person for a while. Cops have places to go to too, and they use the same streets as everyone else, so probability says that occasionally they'll end up behind your car. Act normal, just don't go much too fast, and everything will be fine. They are most likely not out to get you, so if you don't act stupid they will leave you alone.
Ki11erC 18
@36 You are correct but that's not provable until after the situation is over, more than likely it is as showing themselves gives the game away if they really were tailing.
brenton490 19
There is actually a rule on the road . Far left lane is as you probably know is for passing. If you are going slower then the car next to you should probably get over. But over kill though for a ticket. But the rule has to be enforced some how I guess.
lil_ham1644 29
36: I was just thinking the same thing. Yes, I get paranoid when a cop is behind me, but that does not mean they are waiting for me to do something wrong (Although, some may me total jerks & do tail people for fun). 43: it's really more of a common curtesy thing than a law & not a real reason to pull someone over for driving slower in the left lane. The husband of the couple I babysit for is a cop & I ask him driving questions the time.
MrConcise 35
@36 - It can be either, but it's more commonly used in the way you described. If you look up the definition in the Oxford Dictionary, one of them is simply "follow".
im_a_black_guy 10
Nope go the proper speed
ninjakreborn 1
Not a good idea necessarily. There is a chance they will pull you over just because of that. The situation of someone pulled over with hazards on tends to get cops to pull over to help or see what's going on. I've had that happen 4-5 times with hazard lights on under different circumstances. Even cops coming out of nowhere when we were just there naturally.
PleasantDino 22
obey the law and you won't have any reason to worry with a cop behind you :)
MrSassypants 34
Not really. For some reason, I just worry anytime a cop is near me. Like I feel like I just robbed a liquor store or something even when I didn't do anything wrong. Maybe I'm just a paranoid weirdo. I don't know. ¯_(ツ)_/¯
cre8tvlylicnsd 14
Not necessarily... I got pulled over for running an "imaginary" stop sign (the road is approximately a 10 mile straight shot). I'm a a Muslim Arab-American that drives black 96 Cadillac Eldorado with a license plate that says NYMBUS. It doesn't get more conspicuous than that, apparently, because I get pulled over very regularly.
rocker_chick105 31
I was put in the opposite situation as OP's. To avoid a bad pothole, I drove around it. Since it was at 10 pm on a Saturday night, the cop pulled me over and asked if I had been drinking. Sometimes you can't win OP.
Marie54321 19
Seems like you just can't win
sunnyray812 42
You can prove him wrong with a breathalyzer.
devildog562 33
But they make you do stupid shit before a breathalyzer. I got pulled over and he asked me to recite the alphabet backwards from s without singing . What the hell is that ... I couldn't do that on a good day more less under scrutiny.
slyde32 12
I love that police in Australia don't do that stupid sobriety test. "now if I could get you to do the alphabet backwards for me, please" "alright officer, arrest me now"
CarlosDanger 12
Sabriety tests are multiple tests. If you ask for a breathalyzer you will get one
Helpfulman 17
Tell him to **** off then shoot him with a rocket launcher.
randomname98 22
Where on planet earth did that come from?
MrConcise 35
@11 - I'm assuming he wanted some smoked ham.
woainishamu 21
This isn't Halo
Zelphoric 25
More like GTA. Those cops will come after you if you even look at them funny.
gatorclay97 28
Do this. (Don't)
Fishin_for_Coins 7
I don't see the problem with this,seems perfectly reasonable.
DontClickOnMe 28
Worrying about a cop behind you when you're not doing anything illegal is pointless. But I'm sure you probably took a breathalyzer test and they realized you weren't actually intoxicated.
Dlzq 22
You should be good, why'd he arrest you without proof anyways?
dyehardxen 19
Where did OP say they were arrested?
Dlzq 22
That's not what I'm saying, I'm just saying nothing serious can come out of him being stopped.
iLike2Teabag 27
Why *would* he arrest you, not why did he, I believe is what he meant.
Dlzq 22
Holy ****, y'all thought 'why'd' meant 'why did'? CHRIST.
TallMist 32
Most people do. Most of the time, anyways.
isabellasimone 18
Maybe you didn't see it or something. I hope you passed the DUI test he gave you...if he gave you one at all. If not, defend yourself in court!
The_Big_Boss 20
When a cop follows me. I pull over without his lights on. Shut my truck off. If he asks why I pulled over, tell him I needed to make a phone call. Gets him off your ass. Aint letting him follow me for miles and look for a reason to ticket me