Today, while out shopping, I noticed a seedy bum kept following a girl around the store. Trying to be a good samaritan, I trailed them into the street. The bum jogged up behind her and looked like he was about to grab her, so I ran up and tackled him to the ground. Turns out he was her father. FML
Collection
Halloween
A failed costume, stolen candy and a very real scare: Halloween, the one night when fear is allowed.
Today, at the mall, I ran into a lost, crying little girl. It was my best friend's daughter. She recognized and clung on to me. As I called her dad, some nosy lady snatched her from me and caused a scene, screaming, "KIDNAPPER!" As I got apprehended, her claim was she heard me say, "If you still want to see her…" FML
Today, I was at the mall with some friends. In the food court we passed by this creepy pervert feeling up a woman. I take a closer look and realize with horror that the guy is my dad in sunglasses and a hat. The lady he was with was not my mom. FML
Today, in a sporting goods store, my mom was over on the other side of the store, when a cute guy came over to talk to me. When she saw this she grabbed a bat, walked over to us and said, "If you ever even look at my daughter again, I will beat you shitless." She was serious. He ran. FML
Today, while walking around the local thrift store, I noticed an attractive guy watching me and following me through the aisles. As he followed me to my car I was sure I would get his number. He then asks me to bring my purse inside as I had been tagged as a shoplifter. I work at the store. FML
Today, as I walked out of the local store, I noticed a young girl was sitting on the curb, crying. I nudged her with the Snickers bar I had bought earlier, thinking she needed it more than me. After looking at it, she yelled, "PEDOPHILE!", punched me in the balls, and then ran away screaming. FML
Today, while I was shopping, I spotted a lady who had the last of an item I wanted in her cart. She went off to the dressing room, so seeing my opportunity, I went and grabbed it from her cart, and put it in mine. I hadn't noticed her bratty-ass daughter next to the cart, who then yelled, “I saw that! Mommy! Some lady's stealing from your cart!” FML
Today, I was walking through a rough part of town, when a woman screamed that I'd stolen her bag. I was tackled to the ground by a large guy, who then gave my bag to her. FML
Today, I saw a woman drop her wallet in the grocery store. Being a good citizen, I sprinted after her to return it. She heard me running, panicked and took off. I ended up chasing her through three aisles saying, “Wait! I have your wallet!” Security got involved. FML
Today, I was at the mall and I saw a kid crying. I asked her "What's wrong sweetie, are you lost?" She ran away screaming "Help me!" I ended up having to explain to a dumb mall cop that I'm not a perv. FML
Today, I was at the mall and someone peeked their head under the door of my dressing room while I was half dressed. Not knowing who it was, I kicked him in the face just out of instinct. Its was a 4 year old kid looking for his mother. FML
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Top comments
tarabelle 7
thank you for trying to do the right thing, but I'm sorry it didn't go the way you thought it would.
DeathBunny218 37
Most stalkers start out as "Good samaritans" :P ... and didn't you notice them at the checkout together because they must have spoke to each other at some point
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Comments (97)
socialdisease 1
Never make quick assumptions so fast. But hey, you had good intentions.
MangoRico1 1
I wonder how he reacted with good intentions you had
incrapper 7
no u just wanted to look like the hero so you can get some poontang after
ImmaB3AST 7
Anything for sex I see...
sayitagain 9
That's just sad.
perdix 31
Why are you apologizing? You probably stopped a case of incest.
ShyAnn29 15
At least he was trying to help, it would be worse if he did nothing and a child did get abducted!
varkey 7
Wait for actual evidence first, then step in. When cops do something like this, people riot, and they have a right to be angry. I hope he presses charges.
mgsoloist 14
really? Why would he press charges against someone who thought they were trying to help his daughter? It's an inconvenience, but certainly not something you should press charges for. People try to sue/press charges for every little thing nowadays.
koe4 0
i think most ppl look at it like "you would if you could so why shouldnt i?"
a_nutritionist 10
or because people have the right to be minding their own business without being assaulted. you know, like the "crime" he was trying to prevent? im sure the whole thing was based on the dads appearance rather than actions, because as we all know seedy bums have a tendency to abduct young girls...from shopping centres...where they drag them away from the public to their...er...yeah.
chugs69 5
You are such a hero
mrahhhhh 21
So now he may have to turn over the football to your team?