Today, I told my girlfriend that I love her. She panicked and blurted out our S&M safeword. FML
Collection
Fall
Dead leaves, the first cold of the season and an umbrella flipped inside out: fall, the season of grace.
Today, I proposed to my girlfriend. She promptly had a panic attack and screamed, "No!" FML
Today, my girlfriend suggested we start using a safe word during sex - not because we're into BDSM or anything like that, it's just in case she gets bored and wants me to stop. FML
Today, my boyfriend told me he loves me. Instead of saying it back, I had a panic attack. FML
Today, I worked up the courage to tell my girlfriend that I love her. She made a face like she'd just sucked on a lemon and said, "Um... yay, I guess...?" and awkwardly left the room. FML
Today, my girlfriend admitted she had a nightmare about having sex with me. FML
Today, I was having some kinky sex with my girlfriend. When I said "You've been a bad girl", she looked at me wide-eyed and asked very seriously, "What did I do?" FML
Today, my girlfriend confided in me that she wanted to try bondage. Since I trust her, I said sure. After I was tied to the bed, she tickled me until I pissed myself. FML
Today, I was making love to my fiancée, when she dug her nails into my back and told me to "choke" her like I did last night. I was at work last night. FML
Today, I told my girlfriend I wanted to tell her something important. Coincidentally, she did too. She wanted to tell me that she thinks she's actually gay. I wanted to tell her I love her. FML
Today, I was having sex with my girlfriend. Mid-thrust she says "I love you, Jeremy." Then in rapid succession, she fires off 2 other names. None of the names were mine. FML
Feel like sharing it with the other FML users?
Thanks, your FML was submitted, and will appear in the moderation queue soon!
Top comments
Redoxx_fml 22
I hope the safe word was "loveyoutoo"
bromeister 6
You simply made her think of what she loves most..
Add a comment · Reply to
You must be logged in to be able to post comments!
Comments (153)
ZombieSazza 34
Maybe she's just not ready to make that step yet, give her time. She maybe does love you but isn't ready to tell you yet. It's good that she trusts you enough for you to both enjoy S&M, so here's hoping that trust, commitment and affection will make her return your love one day.
drshn 22
Awwwa, you are sooo nice and optimistic
sassy2085 16
You have a S&M safe word. No wonder love was not on the agenda
TheDrifter 24
You say that like love and kinky sex are mutually exclusive concepts.
AlwaysWatching 27
Pineapples was the first thing that came to mind when I thought of what it could be XD
invadermaythe1st 35
PINEAPPPPLLLEEEEEEESSS!
xswtnsour13x 6
What is S&M safeword?
NiceGuysDoWin 21
Sadomasochism (S&M) is sexual gratification through giving or receiving pain. Most people think of it as kinky sex. For a lot of S&M participants, a power struggle is part of the fun. Saying "no, stop, that hurts" and pretending to not enjoy it can add to the thrill of being tied up. In those cases, the couple assigns a word that would not be normally shouted in the bedroom to indicate 'No, I'm serious, there is a problem and I need you to stop what you are doing". That is called a safe word. (Red, Yellow, Pineapple, pomegranate, Cheerios...whatever).
Metagame 12
You know what also works as a safe word? "RAPE!" Then again, it can also turn your living room into an accidental crime scene and get you in trouble, so...
RabbitOfAurora 28
I feel like this is the most appropriate thing I've ever heard in my life.
Cynical_1 26
Maybe if you'd tied her up and applied some nipple clamps before saying it she would have been more receptive? lol.
trucker2 33
Make sure you hang weights too.
mufasaniqqa 13
I don't get it
MasterSharkus 1
haha unlucky