Today, my parents thought it would be a great surprise to accidentally shoot me in the leg for my birthday. FML
Collection
Fall
Dead leaves, the first cold of the season and an umbrella flipped inside out: fall, the season of grace.
Same thing different taste
Today, I went to the gun range for a birthday and got shot in the foot by my mom. FML
Gun control
Today, I took my 15-year-old daughter to our local shooting range for her birthday, as she requested. While she was setting up a target in front of me, I jokingly pulled the trigger and shouted, "Think Fast!" not realizing that the safety was off. I shot my daughter in the arm on her birthday. FML
Lovely
Today, my parents forgot it was my birthday. They ordered me to scrub the common bathroom, and when I asked if they'd remembered, my dad's reaction was, "Oh! Really?" My mom's was, "I thought that it was next week." What lovely parents I have. FML
Hey, well, happy birthday anyway
Today, my parents took me out to dinner. I thought they were taking me because it's my birthday. Turns out they are getting divorced. They forgot it was my birthday. FML
Brown and sticky
Today, I came home a day after my birthday, and was greeted by my mother who told me, "Oh, I have birthday present for you." She explained that she and my father went on a hike, and handed me my present. I got a fucking stick for my birthday. FML
Thanks Susan
Today, my aunt asked to see my new airsoft pistol. Not thinking anything of it, I handed it to her. She shot me in the leg. I was standing next to her. FML
Today, I thought my family would like it if I celebrated the new year with them. My brother thought that I'd like him to shoot my butt with his new gun in celebration. FML
Today, I went paintballing with my siblings. Once we were done, they realised I hadn't been shot at all. They cornered me in the forest and lit me up. I have welts all over my legs. FML
Thanks for coming to my TED Talk
Today, it's my birthday. My dad was supposed to take me to get a tattoo, but instead he went to the bar, got drunk, and told me how I was the biggest mistake he and my mom have ever made. FML
Sweet Sixteen
Today, it's my 16th birthday. My parents forgot about it, and planned a weekend out of town. I was alone on my birthday. FML
Top comments
SharnaaaBanana 22
With an actual bullet? Or something like a BB gun?
fsomelife 26
Bazooka. Nothing out of the ordinary.
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Comments (141)
Cass_x 22
Great parents you have D: Also, happy birthday!
GreatGeak 8
woah, op can't just leave us hanging like that...why'd they shoot him?
Pat_Tricksta 13
For the surprise!
Wolf87535 4
This needs too much follow up. Shot with what? Were they drunk? Wtf?
Testing1234 25
Are you a redneck
zBLAKEz 23
Well at least you did get a birthday surprise.
9echo 17
I can't imagine what LEAD up to all this...
9echo 17
Backfire isn't a firearms-related term but I'll give you an upvote for trying anyway. Lol.
SharnaaaBanana 22
With an actual bullet? Or something like a BB gun?
fsomelife 26
Bazooka. Nothing out of the ordinary.
junkman6 22
Chuck Norris once took a bazooka to the knee... Ok I'll stop.
cakefete2 31
Yea 41, I heard about that incident. The missile hit his knee, dropped to the floor, and started screaming in pain. Meanwhile, Chuck Norris walks away like nothing happened.
pugpuggy 21
#51 Wait, then who got shot in the knee?
SgtAssCheeks 21
I used to be an adventurer like you...
brmsnipes 8
Shit yes! I love Skyrim!
andiesaur 18
I guess you'll have another story to tell your children! Look on the bright side, no matter how small it is.
Pat_Tricksta 13
Talking about penis?
GeneralySpeaking 11
That's what she said.
LifeMD 14
At least you'll have a great story to tell for years.
PinkkyPek 6
guess you could say it ended with a bang
AnOriginalName 19
And not the kind of bang that one would expect for a birthday.
lexiieeex3 32
This needs a followup asap
thelittlemissy 29
Smashing!
Never_Land 10
You tried #7
ElricMustang 23
What I'm wondering is how this happened to begin with. What birthday surprise involves something that you can accidentally shoot someone with?
Headcrab 29
I'm going out on a limb here but if I really had to guess... I'd say a gun.
grunt_fml 17
I'd say shooting a salute gone terribly wrong. That or it was a slightly drastic hint that Op REALLY needs to move out. Now.
icnburbbygrl 23
Uhh...follow up?? Please?
1dvs_bstd 41
day 2, still in the hospital.
cakefete2 31
Well kids, I got this scar 15 years ago, when grandma and grandpa "accidentally" shot me in my leg for my birthday. While recovering in the hospital, there was this beautiful nurse taking care of me, and that's how I met your mother.
DaMann360 19
^^ this guy ^^
llamaslikesoda 21
#52 I officially love you
cumberbunny 17
Let's hope it was a paintball gun! FYL and happy birthday :)