Today, I told my girlfriend that I love her. She panicked and blurted out our S&M safeword. FML
Collection
Fall
Dead leaves, the first cold of the season and an umbrella flipped inside out: fall, the season of grace.
Today, I proposed to my girlfriend. She promptly had a panic attack and screamed, "No!" FML
Today, my girlfriend suggested we start using a safe word during sex - not because we're into BDSM or anything like that, it's just in case she gets bored and wants me to stop. FML
Today, my boyfriend told me he loves me. Instead of saying it back, I had a panic attack. FML
Today, I worked up the courage to tell my girlfriend that I love her. She made a face like she'd just sucked on a lemon and said, "Um... yay, I guess...?" and awkwardly left the room. FML
Today, my girlfriend admitted she had a nightmare about having sex with me. FML
Today, I was having some kinky sex with my girlfriend. When I said "You've been a bad girl", she looked at me wide-eyed and asked very seriously, "What did I do?" FML
Today, my girlfriend confided in me that she wanted to try bondage. Since I trust her, I said sure. After I was tied to the bed, she tickled me until I pissed myself. FML
Today, I was making love to my fiancée, when she dug her nails into my back and told me to "choke" her like I did last night. I was at work last night. FML
Today, I told my girlfriend I wanted to tell her something important. Coincidentally, she did too. She wanted to tell me that she thinks she's actually gay. I wanted to tell her I love her. FML
Today, I was having sex with my girlfriend. Mid-thrust she says "I love you, Jeremy." Then in rapid succession, she fires off 2 other names. None of the names were mine. FML
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Top comments
Redoxx_fml 22
I hope the safe word was "loveyoutoo"
bromeister 6
You simply made her think of what she loves most..
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Comments (153)
AutumnRed 9
I'm sorry, but I don't understand. Can someone explain?
limabeans101029 21
Lots of above comments give a good explanation :)
stonerchikk 4
Damn man, that sucks.
neuronerd 29
I don't know which is worse, that, or the time I pretended to be asleep when the last guy said he loved me. *snore*
BossPathfinderGM 14
Our safe word is "Ladybug". It's not for S&M, though, that's not our thing. It's for my wife's social anxiety. If she starts to feel a panic attack coming on, or just feels terribly uncomfortable or threatened, it's her way if saying "Take me out of here right now and don't waste time asking questions."
Deltaforce1 9
" I love you " " STRAWBERRIES"
JRtheSnowman 5
I can't say your life sucks, when you have a girlfriend freaky enough to have a safe word
Obe27 7
Hahaha made me think of Kevin Hart xD
ImPzyched 6
She couldn't handle it. Those kind of girls are not emotionally ready
Shadow1290 4
'those kind of girls' .... your comment is not only offensive it's also ignorant. Whether she's ready to say i love you or not has nothing to do with them being into S&M.
clair_brodie 35
At least it was used in the right context of 'this needs to stop now and go no further until things are talked about'
clair_brodie 35
As for safewords, my last one used was pistachio ice cream.