Today, I tried to seduce my boyfriend so I mounted him and began kissing him. He immediately pretended to snore into my mouth and rolled over, making me fall off of the bed. FML
Collection
Fall
Dead leaves, the first cold of the season and an umbrella flipped inside out: fall, the season of grace.
Today, I tried to wake my boyfriend up to sex. When I went to touch his penis, he elbowed me in the face, mumbled an apology and began snoring again. FML
Today, while my boyfriend was going down on me, he fell asleep right between my legs. The worst part was I only noticed when he started snoring. FML
Today, in an attempt to be sexy, my boyfriend picked me up and threw me down onto the bed. I fell straight through it. FML
Today, I wanted to seduce my boyfriend so I put on my sexiest lingerie and started playing mood music. As he was eating dinner, I climbed up on the table and started seductively crawling across to him. The table collapsed under my weight. FML
Today, my boyfriend fell asleep while still giving me oral sex. FML
Today, I was finally having sex with the man of my dreams, and then he fell asleep on top of me. FML
Today, I was having really great sex with my boyfriend. I was on top and he seemed like he was really enjoying it. Then, I realized he'd fallen asleep. FML
Today, after finally getting up the confidence, I started talking really dirty to my boyfriend on the phone. I was getting really onto it, and he seemed to enjoy it too. Then I stopped for a second to gauge his reaction. He was snoring. FML
Today, while trying to rouse my sleeping boyfriend for some morning sex, he came. FML
Today, my boyfriend fell asleep while watching TV. I thought it would be cute to try to kiss him awake like they do in the movies. He farted. FML
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Top comments
Gabilliam 19
"I mounted him" I don't know why I'm laughing at this
LennyComa 39
That Sucks, but maybe he was really tired and didn't feel like having sex. It's unlikely but not unheard of.
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Comments (48)
FaultfulJoy 7
Wow, what a douche!
Seashells77 25
Well.. take a hint.
Geeve95 11
You need a new boy friend.
ShenaniganNinja 20
Contrary to popular opinion, men can also not want sex sometimes. He could have just said so though.
yerrkiddingme 2
Hahahaha hilarious **** you!
Honema 16
why's everyone asuming he made her fall off the bed on purpose?? I've thrown my boyfriend on the floor on accident while rolling over as well...
demonfacee 14
Ask him if he wants to be seduced before you seduce him.
Levigasm 6
Newsflash, we don't always want sex.
ChibiChibi_fml 28
That's fine but why does it seem like everyone thinks that in order to turn down sex a guy has to be a dick? He could just as easily have said, "Not tonight, I'm really tired." Instead he chose to fake sleep by rudely snoring into her and then roll over. I'm sure him knocking her off the bed was an accident but he'd have to be a moron to not have known it was a risk. A risk he chose to take rather than just politely decline her advances.
yoursucklives 36
@40 the 'rudely snoring into her' part somehow made me laugh. you're still right though.
kodaxX 8
I don't know why, but I find this very funny. xD
azlyndennis 6
My boyfriend did this as a joke.