Today, I had to explain to my neighbor that not all black people are lactose intolerant. His eyes still bulge out every time I eat cheese. FML
Collection
Thanksgiving
Questions about your love life, a burnt turkey and the cousin who knows everything: Thanksgiving, a contact sport.
Today, my 23-year old boyfriend is not talking to me because I bought the regular kind of macaroni and cheese instead of the cartoon kind. FML
Today, my coworker pointed to our nervous new intern and asked who he was. I jokingly said, "Can't you tell? He's our new slave." I then quickly realized how bad that sounded, given the intern is black. FML
Today, my boss fired me for being "too morally ambiguous". I work at a bagel shop and had told a customer that I was indifferent towards cream cheese. FML
Today, I came across a tourist in the street asking people for directions, but nobody understood him. I speak English, so I went to help the gentleman out. He said "Knock it off with the cheesy accent, pal" and informed me that my country is a shithole. FML
Today, a colleague found out that I struggled with anorexia when young. After ranting about how it's a silly 'Women's disease', he renamed me 'Miss Piggy' and made oinking noises every time I ate something. FML
Today, I was together with a few of my friends when I got up the courage to confess I have an eating disorder. One of my friends then said "... but you're not skinny." FML
Today, as always, my boyfriend has the ability to pop his eyeballs out of his eye sockets. He thought it'd be funny for me to wake up face-to-face with the disgusting sight. The shit in my bowels did an early Thanksgiving Day parade straight into my underwear. FML
Today, I went to Cheesecake Factory for dinner. There was a hot waiter who kept passing by. He saw me looking at him and I knew I had to say something. So when he approached my table I asked, "Excuse me, do you have any salt?" and he said, "I think it's right there on the table." FML
Today, I told my grandma my boyfriend had cheated on me. She told me that it was my fault for not straightening my hair, and for gaining a few pounds. FML
Today, I was trying to explain to my mom that I've been having panic attacks. I ended up having a panic attack from talking about having a panic attack. FML
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Top comments
candiicane 12
Where does that even come from?
OffToTheGayBar 9
Ignorance, don't ya love it? I do.
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Comments (133)
ecreader 8
My black friend just told me about this streotype yesterday. I didn't think this was a real streotype, now I do!
princessjada 5
Well good news is i find your neighbor is a dumbass for thinking that bad news i almost choked off my yogurt when i read it
MissMisc3 7
^.^ You can't convince them all. That said, I found this incredibly funny (but I have no idea why). Thanks for posting. :D
princessmollysue 9
Really !!!! That was so ignorant to just even think that !!! BS
WeWereWealth7 7
After a lot of my black friends told me about their distaste for milk/yogurt/etc., I searched the internet for some sort of correlation and found something that said a notable percentage of African-Americans are lactose intolerant. That being said, nothing has ever said all or even a great amount of African-Americas are lactose intolerant. So shame on OP's friend for generalizing us. I still loves my milk and cheese and yogurt.
interesting33 37
Stare at him in shock whenever he eats something that is NOT milk etc. :P Say you thought white people could only eat things with dairy in and refuse to take no for an answer :P
13yearoldpridigy 1
I agree with the people saying that African Americans and Asians are mostly lactose. I'm black but I'm not lactose intolerant but my mother,who is Asian, is.
MandieL 27
My husband is half Asian half Ukrainian and lactose intolerant. My FIL is full Asian and has a sensitivity to lactose. I am German, English, Ukrainian, Irish, and French (probably some more in there too, I'm a Mutt haha) and I can eat cheese and drink milk till the cows come home. I'm curious if my daughter will produce lactase in her later years now.
AliceDMalice 11
I...What. xD
bellaclare 7
This is my favourite ever FML.
Comoke1024 19
There are no words
Kitouran 30
Looks like you found some.