Today, I rejected my wife for sex. She then started to masturbate next to me. I got an erection. She then rejected me for sex. FML
Collection
Halloween
A failed costume, stolen candy and a very real scare: Halloween, the one night when fear is allowed.
Today, my wife caught me masturbating to porn. She screamed at me and asked why I would be masturbating when I had her to have sex with. So I asked if she wanted to have sex, she said no. FML
Today, I started coming on to my girlfriend, only to get a nasty rejection. I told her I would just go jerk off, to which she replied, "Don't you dare!" FML
Today, I caught my wife trying to give herself oral sex. It was sexy and also kinda funny, so I offered to do it to her properly. She got explosively mad for some reason and actually threw me out. I’m writing this from my brother's spare room, wondering where I went wrong. FML
Today, I woke up with a raging hard on. My wife, who was also awake, felt it when I pressed against her. She said, "No thank you," got up, and walked away. FML
Today, my hand fell asleep while I was masturbating. My own body rejected me. FML
Today, I caught my husband masturbating to porn. I screamed at him and demanded to know why he was masturbating when he has a wife to have sex with. He said, "Because you always reject me?" I was about to yell back when I realized he was right. I'm a terrible wife. FML
Today, after weeks of every excuse not to, my wife wanted sex. It was amazing, and she had at least 3 orgasms. Instead of cuddling afterwards, she got up like someone kicked her and started bitching about all the things she could have been doing, as she got dressed and stormed out. FML
Today, I masturbated 3 times to the thought of my wife because we don't have sex anymore. FML
Today, an hour after having been turned down for sex, I walked in on my wife fingering herself to a copy of War and Peace. FML
Today, I woke up to my girlfriend masturbating beside me. I asked if she needed a hand. She called me a pervert and now won't speak to me. FML
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Top comments
caancoha 0
How do you not deserve this? "Treat others as you would like to be treated." Go luck your wounded manhood.
Heartside 0
Seriously. Wow. You deserved that. Good for her.
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Comments (135)
caancoha 0
How do you not deserve this? "Treat others as you would like to be treated." Go luck your wounded manhood.
skullbashd 3
pwned
lovinglifelaughi 0
can you give your wife my # so I can help her out?
soul_fml 0
op, that's wat u deserve for rejecting sex
caancoha 0
Whoops . Lick^
Heartside 0
Seriously. Wow. You deserved that. Good for her.
Aisaii 0
totally deserved that, your wife rocks
anonacs 0
Your fault, **** you for thinkng otherwise.
MzMegs 20
You deserve it for turning down sex. Seriously?
fobchick 0
I would do the same thing! Your wife is awesome, you on the other hand suck.
Fireashes250 16
Yea. Now he has to use use his "hand". Get it? Anybody...? Ok...
murrychristmas 0
dumb*ss
SweetestSin 4
Sorry but YDI! Sadly my husband hasn't learned this either as I couldn't celebrate the start of Christmas with awesome sex because my husband was too busy with the xbox. Don't turn her down and you won't get turned down
perdix 31
Any man who is worth a damn will always prefer his wife's box over an Xbox! ;) @OP: Dude, there's a double standard and I don't think many people think it is unfair. A wife can reject her husband from time to time and he should handle it like it's no big deal, but husbands can NEVER reject their wives (maybe there are some rare occasions where he can.) To a woman, when her husband turns her down for sex, it means one (or both) of two things: 1) He's getting it somewhere else 2) He is not attracted to her. Both are pretty deadly blows to a woman, and your recovery from them will be difficult if it can be achieved at all. When you sign up for marriage, you'd better be ready to give it up to your wife on demand, or prepare to lead a cold life.
HarperGirl 4
or maybe he is just tired or stressed or something
abasio 1
Not tired enough not to want it later.
jujubunni5 9
Haha I join my boyfriend on the Xbox and have such festivities after (:
jmcr 27
Not true my bf rejected me for sex only when he is too tired to after a long day and thats understandable the thing is that op's wife wanted to have sex but he turned her down so she was taking care of it herself and so HE got horny and wanted sex after that i think its fair to say in this scenario he had it coming
DynamicDave 11
And you expected a different result than that because...??? Go **********. YDI