Today, I had to explain to my neighbor that not all black people are lactose intolerant. His eyes still bulge out every time I eat cheese. FML
Collection
Thanksgiving
Questions about your love life, a burnt turkey and the cousin who knows everything: Thanksgiving, a contact sport.
Today, my 23-year old boyfriend is not talking to me because I bought the regular kind of macaroni and cheese instead of the cartoon kind. FML
Today, my coworker pointed to our nervous new intern and asked who he was. I jokingly said, "Can't you tell? He's our new slave." I then quickly realized how bad that sounded, given the intern is black. FML
Today, my boss fired me for being "too morally ambiguous". I work at a bagel shop and had told a customer that I was indifferent towards cream cheese. FML
Today, I came across a tourist in the street asking people for directions, but nobody understood him. I speak English, so I went to help the gentleman out. He said "Knock it off with the cheesy accent, pal" and informed me that my country is a shithole. FML
Today, a colleague found out that I struggled with anorexia when young. After ranting about how it's a silly 'Women's disease', he renamed me 'Miss Piggy' and made oinking noises every time I ate something. FML
Today, I was together with a few of my friends when I got up the courage to confess I have an eating disorder. One of my friends then said "... but you're not skinny." FML
Today, as always, my boyfriend has the ability to pop his eyeballs out of his eye sockets. He thought it'd be funny for me to wake up face-to-face with the disgusting sight. The shit in my bowels did an early Thanksgiving Day parade straight into my underwear. FML
Today, I went to Cheesecake Factory for dinner. There was a hot waiter who kept passing by. He saw me looking at him and I knew I had to say something. So when he approached my table I asked, "Excuse me, do you have any salt?" and he said, "I think it's right there on the table." FML
Today, I told my grandma my boyfriend had cheated on me. She told me that it was my fault for not straightening my hair, and for gaining a few pounds. FML
Today, I was trying to explain to my mom that I've been having panic attacks. I ended up having a panic attack from talking about having a panic attack. FML
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Top comments
candiicane 12
Where does that even come from?
OffToTheGayBar 9
Ignorance, don't ya love it? I do.
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Comments (133)
Baller_Bob 17
I am so confused
bunny409 14
that's a stereotype? hell im black and I didn't know that..i'm lactose ontolerant myselg
horneyhic 15
Accually they are the only ppl who are not lactose intolerant are ppl from the northern herding regions of Europe. Every body who doesn't have some genitic tie to that area is lactose intolerant but some are asymptomatic
Rodville 28
Humans being able to eat dairy past infancy is a fairly recent change (past 500 years or so) so it's no wonder not everyone can tolerate it yet.
XBurytheCastleX 25
Be thankful... Being lactose intolerant is painful. Especially if you love ice cream.
AHzulu 25
das rasis
ohSNAPyall 27
What the heck is asymptomatic lactose intolerance? How would it exist without symptoms? I thought that was the entire definition of this food sensitivity.
horneyhic 15
Only Northern Europeans can process lactose properly because they've be raising it for About 3000years it to new to everybody else. You need a certain gene to process lactose only Northern Europeans have that gene. But if you don't have that gene while technically you are lactose intolerant you may not have symptoms
sicksadworld1317 30
@268- I can understand this. I was vegan for a total of 3 months before deciding I couldn't live without cheese; but during that time I learned that humans are the only species to consume milk past infancy. Our bodies weren't originally built to process dairy and lactose well; but since we continue to consume it the body has found ways of adapting and processing it. It makes sense that people could technically be lactose intolerant while showing little to no symptoms once their bodies adapt.
reneetlovesyou 30
The enzyme in our bodies used to break down lactose is called lactase. Lactose intolerance occurs when someone's body doesn't make enough of this enzyme to eat since dairy isn't technically necessary after infancy. Many decendents of Africa and China are lactose intolerant.