Today, my husband wrote all these wonderful romantic messages to me via Facebook, proclaiming his love to me in front of all my friends and family. Too bad he hasn't spoken to me in "real life" for almost 3 weeks. FML
Collection
Fall
Dead leaves, the first cold of the season and an umbrella flipped inside out: fall, the season of grace.
Today, my husband is so bored with speaking to me, he literally walked outside when I was mid-sentence during a conversation about how I need more attention in our relationship. We've only been married 3 months. FML
Today, the guy I've been texting told me he loved me and he couldn't wait to make me his wife, and he couldn't wait for us to have kids and grow old together. I've only known him for 3 days. FML
Today, I received a beautiful, heart-felt text from my boyfriend detailing all the ways he loved me. He probably should have emphasized just how big his heart is though because he sent the text to three other women too. Thank you, group messaging. FML
Today, I checked my facebook, and my wife of 5 years was listed as single. I then write on her wall that it is ok to announce to be married. She writes back saying that we have to talk and to come to the kitchen. My wife divorced me over facebook. FML
Today, my boyfriend poked me on Facebook. I got excited because this is as close as he's come to touching me in weeks. FML
Today, after feeling fat and ugly and a bit depressed, I logged on to Facebook to see my boyfriend had posted "I have the most beautiful girlfriend in the world!" I 'liked' it and commented "Aww thank you baby!" I logged in later to see that he commented back saying "I didn't mean you." FML
Today, Facebook told me I should reconnect with my husband. FML
Today, my boyfriend wanted to tell me how much he loves me. He said a lot of wonderful things, such as not being able to live without me and hoping that I would want to live with him and marry him someday. He ended his loving speech with his ex-girlfriend's name instead of mine. FML
Today, my boyfriend told me I was the only girl he'd ever text, call, or flirt with again. Later on he told two other girls exactly the same thing on Facebook, not realizing that everybody can read wall messages. FML
Today, it's been a few weeks now since I started dating a boy. A whole fairy tale relationship. He would write me poems and all that garbage. Today, we sat by a bonfire, and he randomly mentioned his three other girlfriends, and how I should accept them due to his family traditionally having cheating husbands. FML
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Top comments
LiveLaughFML 10
#9 "at first, i was curious as to whether or not i should accept his friend invite at first. afterall, i didn't know him in person. but once i saw 10 Mutual Friends, he stole my heart."
agaba 0
Time to dump his ass
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Comments (85)
Jekisbob 5
Well, put out a new FML when you find out it's because he's cheating on you:) We'll be watching for it.
loserman67 36
Change your status to "Just about ready to **** anything that moves" and see how fast he talks to you
manbearpig7173 0
They don't need to know that...
lollipop77_fml 6
Two faced or what? He should maybe put as much effort in the personal relationship with you, not the imaginary one on facebook!
hunkypenguin2007 2
Then y the *** u still with him?!?!?! Kick his ass to the curb!!!!
Person1233 13
Ahh yes. She'll get half of his stuff too. It's foolproof!
missy13him 2
are u sure it to u and not someone else that he in love with
anencephalic 14
It's called "IRL", no wonder he doesn't talk to you, n00b.
anencephalic 14
It's called "IRL", no wonder he doesn't talk to you, n00b.
thekrammer 5
facebook IS real life!
Lolpizza_fml 0
Just for the publicity.