Today, I found out that the only way to get my boyfriend to last more than one minute in the sack is to let him watch cartoons while we do it. FML
Collection
Thanksgiving
Questions about your love life, a burnt turkey and the cousin who knows everything: Thanksgiving, a contact sport.
Today, my boyfriend turned down sex so he could masturbate to his favourite Japanese cartoon porn. I was obviously horny but his compromise was to offer to watch it and masturbate together. I’m an adult damnit, I want sex, not pissing cartoons. FML
Today, I realized that the amount of time it takes my boyfriend to get an erection takes longer than the actual sex. FML
Today, my boyfriend and I decided to try some "prolonging gel" to help him last longer between the sheets. Surprisingly, it worked, and he lasted 3 times longer than usual. I can now enjoy 4 whole minutes of sex. FML
Today, after what I thought was an amazing sex session with my boyfriend, he let out a big sigh and told me I need to watch more porn. FML
Today, I learned that my boyfriend waits 'til I am asleep to wack off to porn on the internet. We haven't had sex in months because he doesn't want to. FML
Today, I found out that my boyfriend would rather jerk off to porn than to ever touch me, even if I wear a naughty outfit. FML
Today, the only way I can get my boyfriend to do anything is by telling him it's a turn on. FML
Today, my boyfriend told me that he'd rather jerk off to sexy pictures of me than actually have sex, because he gets too tired. FML
Today, my boyfriend told me that the only reason he likes me is because I let him watch porn without throwing a fuss. FML
Today, my boyfriend is quite capable of getting an erection. He gets one when we watch porn, when I talk dirty to him and do handjobs or blowjobs, but the moment I get naked for the main event, he goes as soft as a boiled noodle. I haven’t been properly shagged in 6 months. FML
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Top comments
perdix 31
Probably wouldn't last much more than a minute if he was watching Porky Pig, but at least he'd finish you off with "Th-th-th-th-th-that's all, folks!"
MissErikaHart 0
"I'm ready! I'm ready! I'm ready! I'm ready eddy eddy eddy eddy eddy eddy!!!!"
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Comments (129)
suckmysarcasm 10
its no a problem unless he starts screaming yabba dabba doo when he cums.
Blooregard86 0
better than nothing.
Concray 0
At least it isn't the opposite...
CheapGodiva 0
So dump him.
jadejazmyn 5
Get a new boy friend!
mkmorgan30 0
I don't get how guys cum so fast? I'm a guy and my first time I lasted somewhere between 45-60 mins
jmypetersen 2
#124 - ima call bullshit
jdh1997 3
That is freakin hilarious
littlexlune 16
Compromise.
poor_gurll1198 17
Put on the flinstones so he can make your bed rock
worldclassrager 41
It works right? Still I hope he doesn't have to in the future