Today, my 7 year-old daughter loudly asked in the middle of a supermarket, "Mummy, what's a cunt?" FML
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Halloween
A failed costume, stolen candy and a very real scare: Halloween, the one night when fear is allowed.
Today, in the middle of the supermarket, my 7 year old son asked me what a cocksucker is and why his mum always calls me that. FML
Today, my 7-year-old used the word "crap". When I told her that she mustn't use that word because it's rude, she simply replied, "Mother, you should hear the words I use at school." FML
Today, a 7-year-old girl came up to me and told me to go fuck myself. I told her to watch her language or else I'd tell her parents. Her mom happened to be nearby and actually heard the conversation; she came up to me and told me to go fuck myself as well. FML
Today, while waiting in the queue at a supermarket checkout, my three-year-old daughter yells out, "Mom! Mom! Is that a man or a lady in front?" Embarrassed, I reply, "Honey, can't you see that it's a... it's a... a..." FML
Today, while shopping with my 6-year-old daughter, she said, "Mommy, remember you wanna get duck tape!" A middle-aged guy nearby scoffed and told her, "DUCT, not DUCK. Dumb cunt." I ended up having to drive my bawling daughter home, with no shopping. FML
Today, at the supermarket, I picked up a pack of toilet rolls, at which point my 5-year-old daughter turned to me and screamed, "A CLEAN BUTTHOLE IS A HAPPY BUTTHOLE!" in front of a dozen other people. I have no idea where she heard that. FML
Today, I took my grandma to what I thought was a nice movie. An actor used the word "cunt", which prompted her to ask what that word meant in a loud "whisper". She followed up even more loudly with, "Does that mean pussy?" FML
Today, I overheard my 5 year old daughter call a girl in her dance class a slut. Shocked, I asked her where she heard that word. Her response: "I heard you and Daddy say it about her Mommy." FML
Today, in a supermarket, my four-year-old son whispered to me, asking if the checkout lady was able to wash between her fat rolls. She heard. FML
Today, I took my very talkative toddler to a grocery store. As we passed a woman in an aisle, my kid pointed and said loudly, "Mummy, why does that lady have such a funny face?" I had to awkwardly apologize while my face went beet red. FML
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Top comments
fightingkittens 39
When I was two I shouted "OH ****" when I couldn't find something in the fridge. I then told my mom I only said that when I was frustrated. Evidently I had picked up something from my dad getting pissed off at another driver. Kids just know when someone's cursed.
Shemp_5 14
Just tell her its a made up word that doesnt mean anything. Works every time for me with my little cousins
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Comments (72)
gigistar15 21
Just make sure she doesn't repeat that at school
nitrog100 21
It's the UK. It's a totally different context over there. The word may not be appropriate for a child, but people aren't going to be clutching their pearls over it.
doodlecloud 27
Where has this thing about UK and the c-word come from? I have some certain mates who will use it more casually but it's still very much a bad word, probably the worst of the swear words, and is definitely not something you just go around yelling in public, unless you are actually a ****. I definitely wouldn't say it in front of my parents or other similar adults even though they don't generally have a problem with other swear words. **** is still that step too far.
graceface1031 7
When I was little, I started screaming "****" because I thought it was a new word I invented.
karma_kicks_back 16
I have a 2 year old niece who is a chatterbox. She loves saying inappropriate things in public... I feel your pain!!
timbrwolf16 5
my dad told me that it was another word for teacher
Llama_Face89 34
I love that word! One of my greatest hits.
jkp1291 25
My sister once loudly asked, "What's a cliteris?" in a packed movie theatre at a quiet part in the movie. Apparently the old lady in front of them couldn't stop laughing.
caleb_9756 14
When I was eight my dog knocked out my (baby) tooth and I thought it was one of my permanent teeth and I literally screamed as loud as I could "HOLY SHIT" on my couch.
Badkarma4u 17
**** isn't as big of a deal in England as it is In the US.
mattyiscool123 26
That took a such a random turn!!! XD
skittles_love99 4
and explain to me where she heard that word