Today, I went to a huge party. My ex boyfriend was there who I still have feelings for, so I decided to make him jealous by making out with the really drunk guy next to me. While we were making out, he threw up in my mouth and all over me. Everybody found it hysterical including my ex. FML
Collection
Halloween
A failed costume, stolen candy and a very real scare: Halloween, the one night when fear is allowed.
Today, I went to a party and saw my current boyfriend making out with my ex-boyfriend. FML
Today, while picking up my extremely drunk girlfriend from a party, she insisted on attempting to make out with me. She threw up in my mouth mid-kiss. FML
Today, I was at a party and spent the whole night bragging to my friends about how I thought this girl was totally into me. As we were leaving, we saw the same girl making out with my ex. FML
Today, I finally kissed the guy I really love at a party. He took me outside and immediately vomited. FML
Today, while at a party, I ran into the girl I've liked for ages. I was so nervous, but I managed to keep the conversation going for a half hour. After mustering up the courage to ask her out on a date, her drunk, over-protective ex burst in and threw up on my shirt. Good timing, asswipe. FML
Today, I went to a party, and the girl I really like started telling me how much she likes me and how she thought we would be good together. I was so drunk I threw up on her. FML
Today, I woke up on a friend's floor with a massive hangover after her party last night. My friend, who was next to me, barfed all over me. She then told me that while I was drunk last night, I made out with her dog as well as two of our other friend's boyfriends. FML
Today, I got so drunk I called my ex-boyfriend and confessed my love to him. All in front of my current boyfriend. FML
Today, I hung out with my crush for only the second time at his apartment. He was having a party. After a few sips of my green apple Smirnoff, I puked up the chinese food I had eaten earlier all over his new couch in front of him and a bunch of people I didn't know. FML
Today, my ex-boyfriend from two years ago called and asked to come over. Still being in love with him, I agreed to see him but decided I wasn't drunk enough to handle the stress. After a while of drinking, he said that he really missed me and wanted to be with me. My reply consisted of throwing up. FML
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Top comments
Kcired 0
YDI and its stupid, if you have feelings for him, dont you think making out with someone else would completely blow him off??? why dont you.. oh i dont know.. TALK to him?
Ughsucks 0
Yes because the best solution to an ex being around is to make out with someone you've never seen before. Clearly your deduction is faultless.
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Comments (174)
heyyou1203 0
i said FYL b/c no one deserves that, ewwww i'm so sorry!! However, karma is a bitch. The key word in your story was EX b/f. You have feelings for him still, and if he had feelings for u too then he wouldn't be your ex now would he? Obviously that's not the case, as he's still your ex, thus he doesn't give a shit who you make out with! It's one thing to say, I'm going to make out w/ someone to show him that i'm not still crying over him, but don't try to make him jealous. It never works and always backfires.
Xero3g 5
And ms. liberal I take it you are either a feminist or have recently removed yourself from a relationship? Possibly lesbian?
TheGerman 0
Honestly if your were my ex that would make me laugh puke or not. That makes you look like a total fool trying to make somebody jealouse. Jealousy has to come natural not forced. Epic fail btw You'r an idiot.
XxRocker94xX 0
Acting like a ***** won't make anyone jealouse. YDI.
slatertheblob 0
sick one! at least u got a free meal, even if it is second hand.
_FYL_ 0
LOL #38 And eww o.O That prob wouldn't have worked anyway x] Agreed #36
cpatrick820 3
I had an ex that tried to mac on all my friends after I broke up with her. They all called her a ***** and told her to go **** herself. Moral of the story: you're an insecure *****. Your boyfriend was a smart one to leave your dumb ass
Walt_1990 3
Again..Karma damn lol. I guess YDI and FYL (because someone threw up on you, gross).
JJawbreakerr 0
Agree w/ #4. Just talk to him dammit. Making people jealous because you have feelings for them... Kinda defeats the purpose right? YDI
peoc 0
Correction: Everyone found it hysterical, including your ex, and including half the internet. hahahahahahahahahaha