Today, I heard a commercial for a great apartment complex. It includes food, snacks, entertainment, activities, cleaning service, and transportation services if you cannot drive yourself. I was really excited until the end when they repeated the name; too bad my perfect place is a senior center. FML
Collection
Fall
Dead leaves, the first cold of the season and an umbrella flipped inside out: fall, the season of grace.
Today, after I was gentrified out of my rent-controlled San Francisco apartment on June 1st by speculators, which I could only afford because of the rent control, I haven’t been able to find a new place yet. I've been living in hotels off a small settlement, but money ran out last week so now I’m on the streets. FML
Today, I showed up for my first shift in my new night job; I now work at an apartment complex during the day and at a gas station at night. It turns out that our biggest problem tenant in the former happens to be my boss in the latter. FML
Today, I found myself sneaking into my apartment to avoid the old lady who lives next to me. Funnily enough, I moved into my own apartment because I was tired of sneaking into it to avoid my mom, who lived with me. FML
Today, the couple with three noisy toddlers in the apartment above mine finally moved out. A couple with a non-stop crying newborn moved in. FML
Today, my car got keyed because I was parked in a handicapped parking spot. I'm handicapped. FML
Today, I finally started my job as an in-home caregiver. The man I was hired to care for died two hours after I made it to his house. FML
Today, I was told it was inconvenient for me to take lunch breaks, because someone else has to answer the phones and no one else wants to actually do any work. FML
Today, I got on the bus to go to work. I managed to get a seat, but an old lady who looked tired had to stand. I offered her my seat, but she glared at me, frowned and said, "Go fuck yourself." Everyone laughed as I sat there in dismay. FML
Today, I woke up to a glorious sunrise, fresh coffee, and a bleached lawn. My neighbors on both sides have constantly fought with each other since before I even moved in, which I guess explains the note taped to my window saying, "Pick a side." FML
Today, I overheard my boss stressing out over finding a replacement for me. I didn't know I was leaving. FML
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Top comments
obnum 19
I thought it sounded strange that they were offering all that in an apartment...
hunny797 5
You will be eligible for that place sometime later in your life
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Comments (51)
BrimfullOfAsher 20
Didn't the shuffleboard courts and early-bird special at the in-house dining room give you a clue?
west_coast_chic 6
Maybe your T.V. is trying to tell you something ;)
west_coast_chic 6
x
Satoaoi 13
just 70 more years to go: )
yodas0da 12
biiii
conor12 5
I swear you're retarded...
Raykyogrou03 12
Now on a sitcom, the lazy character would actually try to get in by dressing up as an old person.
thebosslikeaboss 18
So, what's stopping you? Go for it !! ;)
In_some_bullshit 13
Had me excited for a minute!
kikks_xx 10
Why don't you just go live in a hotel? No apartment complex comes with all that.