Today, I walked in on my girlfriend having sex with another man. Her main reaction was to get mad at me for not knocking. FML
Collection
Fall
Dead leaves, the first cold of the season and an umbrella flipped inside out: fall, the season of grace.
Today, I saw my girlfriend walking hand-in-hand down the street with another man. When I confronted her, she claimed she had no idea who I was, and the guy told me to beat it. Later on, she returned to our apartment and actually tried to act as if nothing had happened. FML
Today, I came home earlier than usual, only to find my wife having sex with some guy on our bed. Her reaction to being confronted was to look me dead in the eyes and to scream and scream until I got so freaked out that I left. It's her house, and I'm sitting in a library with no idea what to do. FML
Today, I walked in on my girlfriend cheating on me. The guy turned around and said, "Sorry, I borrowed your condoms." FML
Today, my girlfriend and I were going to get intimate, so I masturbated before leaving my place, hoping it would help me last longer than usual. 10 minutes in, she shoved me off and started screaming at me, convinced that I've been cheating on her and practising with someone else. FML
Today, my girlfriend broke up with me. She'd walked in on me jerking off, which she said is exactly the same as cheating on her. FML
Today, my dad walked in on me and my girlfriend having sex. His only reaction was to mutter, "Put some back into it, son." before awkwardly sidling out. FML
Today, I walked in on my husband going down on another woman. Instead of speaking, he looked at me, got up, and slammed the door. FML
Today, my girlfriend sent me a revenge video of her having sex with another guy, because I cheated on her. I got angry with her, but later used the video to masturbate. FML
Today, some filthy creep grabbed my girlfriend's ass in front of me. I smashed his face in, as would be expected. Afterwards, we had wild sex, then she cried, told me how frightened my "unprovoked violent response" made her, and kicked me out. I'm now in a seedy motel, wondering what the hell happened. FML
Today, I was busily having fun with my girlfriend, when suddenly the bedroom door opened and a man walked in, picked me up, and threw me outside the apartment. I was naked and didn't even know she was into men, much less had a husband. FML
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Top comments
Andicc 19
Be glad to be rid of the tramp
misspulkadot24 17
I think she has her priorities off...
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Comments (131)
harryb1963 3
New FML-I was having sex with my girlfriend and some asshole came in without knocking.
mosquito19 14
did you apologize for not knocking?
HighasaCloud 46
Did she also say you were "just **** shaming, really"?
martin8337 36
Soooo not giggity. :-(
chocolatefrog28 29
Knock on wood that doesn't ever happen to you again. Sorry OP, but you're better off now without that awful hussy.
Twisted_Angel 17
I hope she's your ex now..
Setareh23 34
She's trying to shift the bad attention off herself. Don't let her. Make sure she can't play the victim, when you're clearly the victim.
jrock9093 18
Dead weight plenty of fish out there buddy good luck
brandoneyez1 25
Ur ex is a major ***** and a horn dog! Next!
the_shift 13
That sucks... Dump her.