Today, I met a guy at a bar. Went home, got condoms, had sex. Also got Covid. First one night stand in four years. FML
Collection
Fall
Dead leaves, the first cold of the season and an umbrella flipped inside out: fall, the season of grace.
Today, I’m so desperate I hooked up with a guy who has Covid. FML
Today, I found out I have Covid, from a guy who ghosted me last week after sex. FML
Today, a girl I'd been talking to all night actually wanted to come home with me. Stopped to buy condoms. Got home, clothes came off, took out a condom. "Sorry, I'm allergic to latex". She left in a cab. I'm a 27-year old virgin for another night and now have a box of condoms to remind me. FML
Today, I met a guy at a bar and we went back to my room. We start having sex and, about 30 seconds in, he stops and says it's not right - he likes me too much for a one night stand. He gives me his number, a kiss on the cheek, and leaves. It turns out that he'd already came. I called his phone - wrong number. FML
Today, I found out I got HIV. I’ve used condoms with all my Tinder hookups and never shared needles or anything with anyone. I was supposed to have a Tinder date tonight. Guess I’ll just be single forever then. FML
Today, I went to a bar with two guys I was interested in. The first I'd been trying to go out with all semester. The second I had gone to dinner with and he seemed nice. I was the designated driver. They drank too much and, on the way home, hooked up in the back seat. FML
Today, my boyfriend of 2 months and I had sex for the first time last night. This afternoon he texted me saying, "I had an amazing night with you yesterday." Following that text he said, "I forgot to tell you I have an STD." FML
Today, I brought a girl home from a bar. Things were getting hot and heavy when she asked if I had a condom. I opened my wallet to grab the one I keep in there, only to find the empty wrapper in its place; it was the only one I had. It seems drunk me is a bigger jerk than I thought. FML
Today, I finally had sex with the guy I've been seeing. It took him longer to put the condom on than it did to finish. FML
Today, the guy I've been looking forward going on a date with had to cancel due to Covid. This wouldn't have been an issue, if I didn't see him later that night posting about him at a bar with another girl. FML
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Top comments
RichardPencil 32
You have to put the condom over your mouth AND nose to be fully protected from Covid. Come on, man!
randybryant799 21
And you're surprised by this?
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Comments (10)
RichardPencil 32
You have to put the condom over your mouth AND nose to be fully protected from Covid. Come on, man!
randybryant799 21
And you're surprised by this?
Aiden89 23
Could of got HIV, so not so bad?
dumblonde76 3
Vivid sucks but Herpes lasts forever
JackWood 21
Bars are the best place to find Covid
Grizz8831 14
the BC government has been telling people a while now and nobody seems to listen. If you are going to have anonymous sex, use a glory hole to prevent the spread of covid.
Brightside86 31
If you wanted to get covid a bar would be an excellent place to accomplish that. Though I wouldn't feel too bad, getting covid seems inevitable. My doctor tells me most of the people testing positive for covid had already been vaccinated.
Slim87R 7
Womp womp. At least you got a fun night out of it. Or I hope you did at least.
GameofLife29 1
Well it least it wasn't STD.