Today, my family went on vacation. I had to stay home to take care of everyone's animals. I called my mom, who said she was too busy to talk to me. When my sister asked her who was on the phone, she replied, "The dog sitter." FML
Collection
Fall
Dead leaves, the first cold of the season and an umbrella flipped inside out: fall, the season of grace.
Today, my parents called me to ask if I could drop my dog off to them on Sunday. They're having a Superbowl party and want to show her off to their guests. My dog is invited, but I'm not. FML
Today, my sister went into early labor. Instead of telling me, my mom turned to my dog and said, "Guess what? You're going to be an uncle!" Our dog ranks higher than me in our family's metaphorical food chain. FML
Today, I wasn't allowed to work from home, despite being ill enough to just take the day off anyway, all so there could be "someone to answer the phone." The phone didn't ring once all day. FML
Today, I was out walking my dog. I was throwing a stick in the lake so he could go get it (he loves swimming). A friend called me. After I was done calling, another friend came by, and we talked for a while. When my dog barked, I accidentally threw my iPhone into the water instead of his stick. FML
Today, I had been sick all day, so to cheer me up my dad drove me to get ice cream. On our way back, we hit a puppy. FML
Today, I went to my grandmother's house to pick up her cat to take him to the vet. She forgot who I was and sprayed me in the face with pepper spray. FML
Today, I wanted to spend the day cleaning my room. My mom thinks that I was lying just to stay home, so she yelled at me to go to her shop. At the shop, she yelled at me for not being any help. When we got home she yelled at me for having a messy room. FML
Today, I lost my dog. I looked around my neighborhood for hours, and found him under my bed asleep when I got home. FML
Today, it's New Year's Eve. My husband and I weren't invited to any parties, and we don't have a sitter to be able to go out by ourselves. Instead, I'm watching "Beverly Hills Chihuahua 2" on the Disney channel with our 5-year-old, and my husband has passed out on the couch from sheer boredom. FML
Today, I was at my boyfriend's house waiting to surprise him when he got home from work. I was laying in his bed when he called to tell me we were over. I couldn't leave before he got home. FML
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Top comments
sensoon15 7
put the dog in her bed and let it shit and piss everywhere. "the dog sitter didn't do her job. next time you do it."
A7X_LoVeee 10
The ****? I don't know what's worse..the fact that they all went without you or how she referred to you as the dog sitter. Who wants to vote?
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Comments (118)
cgchamp89 7
Family is gone? Throw a party!!!
unfortunate_13 5
my thoughts exactly!
haaschy 0
true dat!!!
ijnek 3
Then don't clean. When the family asked you why its so dirty, tell them you're waiting for them, the house cleaner.
perdix 31
We still don't know what you did to be put in the doghouse, almost literally.
smartalek 2
win, perdix, win.
DoggyDoggWorld 0
^win
mhinaj 0
u have a nice family
electricmaster 0
I hope that's sarcasm.
killabb23 0
it was sarcasm
angryoriental 0
eat all the animals, I assure you they will never leave you home with the animals ever again...
example947 0
...there won't be any animals...
suislideRB 0
I see what you did there >_>
lmaoatall 6
'accidently' lock the dogs in their bedrooms with lots of tuna in oil and canned pedigree, for about two days. please don't forget water. wouldn't want them to get dehydrated and constipated.
missy_n 0
Look at the brighter side --> u'll be in peace without human beings in the house.
Iwashere12345 0
hey, you got a new nickname at least!
GEFStryker 29
Will you doggedly pursue revenge?
CallMeHush 1
Woof, that is ruff.
kendallhi 9
Really...
CallMeHush 1
I couldn't resist.
patrickalamo 48
let them crap in moms room and sleep on her bed, I guess the "dog sitter" failed at the job...just. like mom failed at being a parent...