Today, I accidentally walked in on my roommate while she was changing clothes. She insisted on telling her boyfriend what had happened, because, "It wouldn't feel right" if she didn't. Her boyfriend is a MMA fighter/bodybuilder and has major jealousy issues. I'm screwed. FML
Collection
Fall
Dead leaves, the first cold of the season and an umbrella flipped inside out: fall, the season of grace.
Today, my roommate came home and began changing clothes in the same room that my boyfriend and I were in. I quickly got annoyed and angry and when I began questioning her about it she just laughed while saying, "Oh relax, it's not like he's never seen me naked before." FML
Today, I accidentally walked in on my girlfriend changing. She responded by screaming, throwing herself on the ground to avoid me seeing her, and crawling into the bathroom. We've been living together for two months. FML
Today, I came home and heard a noise in the bathroom. I figured it was my girlfriend, so I went over and as the door closed, I told her not to close it because I'd seen her beautiful body before. Turns out it was our roommate. FML
Today, I came home and heard a noise in the bathroom. I figured it was my girlfriend, so I went over and as the door closed, I told her not to close the door as I've seen her beautiful body before. Turns out it was our roommate. FML
Today, my roommate's boyfriend professed his love to me. I kicked him out, and he stood outside the door calling my name until he saw my roommate coming down the hall. They both came in and he acted like nothing happened. FML
Today, my roommate came home and instantly began raging, cursing, and threatening to kill me. While I was cowering in my bedroom, the police had to settle the situation. All I'd done was rearrange some furniture. FML
Today, I went to my boyfriend's apartment for the first time, only to see another girl walking out. I accused her of cheating with him and we got into a fight. Turns out I was at the wrong apartment. He lives next door. FML
Today, I was chilling at home when my roomie cruised in with a baddie on his arm. She turned out to be a total ho and started trying to get in my pants while he was sitting RIGHT THERE. I did everything I could to shake her off and in the end I just asked her to leave. Fuck, I feel bad for him. FML
Today, I got into a fight with my roommate's girlfriend's best friend. A few hours later, they had me evicted. FML
Today, I found out that my new roommate is dating my ex-boyfriend. FML
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Top comments
amerwin 3
If you can't outrun him, tell him your gay.
alaaloo_fml_fml 0
Your roommate sounds like she is just looking for an excuse to start some drama.... or to see you physically hurt.
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Comments (218)
ecfrost 4
So...have any large friends?
BrenBry 0
Okay, so if he has such jealousy issues, why she have a male room mate? Secondly, if he so jealous, why tattle over something innocent? Sounds like drama starting bitch.
Terezi 0
I definitely agree with the gun-buying suggestion. Nobody's going to take 6 rounds to the head and chest and keep coming after you. I also suggest looking for a new roommate. You know, one that's NOT a drama queen.
TXjuggalo972 6
except a f****** zombie!!!!
Daddymo 14
Just because he does MMS and he's a bodybuilder doesn't mean you can't kick his ass. Walk up close to him and knee him in the balls, when he's lying on the ground tell him to stop being a jealous dick.
xGabri3L 3
His a really good MMS texter.
kevint9911 15
it either a make up threesome or hire a bodyguard
justbigbs 6
Have shotgun ready and loaded, or say your girlfriend was cheating on you because there was another guy on the bed when she was changing.
MrLefty 8
Haha I always enjoy your comments Perdix. They're some of the few I actually laugh out loud at.
inthedarkness_fml 2
if he has jealousy issues, why is he letting her live with a straight dude?
whiteboy84 0
why hide when it was an accident...it's not your fault
josebeto1 6
Why do girls always like to get there bf's jealous